lingliusqie

first week in recce!

2008-11-28T22:37:00.002+08:00

a week in recce course has finally passed and i do realise how hard it is to be part of the country's special forces, donning the coveted jungle hat (officer cadets in jcc don't count, ok? go wear the jockey cap :P). my friend told me that singapore is probably one of the few countries in the world which entrust the duties of reconnaissance and surveillance to non-professional soldiers/conscripts. and it is understandable - regular soldiers are on substantial payroll and are more dedicated to their vocational work than people who serve for the sake of serving, and consequently, the former is better able to accept the hardship, for it is their call of duty.

well, my logic is a little different. the fact that nsfs are being chosen to take on these responsibilities gives us (ok, at least myself) pride in what we are doing. and that motivates us to take all the pain that instructors inflict on us, be it marching around with loads reaching double that of an average infantryman or going on fast marches every other day...

so, i don't understand why people can ck their ns away. i mean, at some point, people would be looking back and asking themselves, wtf had they done as clerks? two years down the drain that way, with no achievements (i'm referring to real achievements)? i can't take that lying... but maybe it's just me, the workaholic.

留恋。

2008-10-17T23:39:00.003+08:00

回到了熟悉的校园，看到了许多熟悉的脸孔，是那么简单的快乐。原来，在学校里以校友的身份走来走去，滋味还真是不一样。学弟学妹似乎都看得出你已经不再是在籍学生，走过都得转过来仔细的看一眼。。。感觉年轻了许多（那不是广告词吗？）！时间还过得真快，转眼间他们都已经准备应付考试，忙忙碌碌，埋首苦读，让我想起那时候我们（懒得）读书，整天玩飞碟：P 即使现在得温习一叠叠的讲义，我想我们好多人也愿意如此。至少，可以保留纯真，免受现实生活的摧残，快快乐乐、逍遥自在地过日子，无需顾虑或烦恼，尽学生的本分就好。。。

老了，责任也跟着来了。他们也像我们那时为了报读大学奔波忙碌，如无头苍蝇一样，不知道这个，不知道那个。。。而刚好在那儿，就一一为他们解答。倒是蛮有趣的，让我想起当时的我也那么无知，懵懵懂懂，就填了表格，把前途寄送到了英国，等待回复，心里煞是紧张。看着他们也如此的焦虑，我想我也有必要让他们知道，一切也不必太过执著，尽量而为就可以了。看开了，要求也不再那么的苛刻，人生也好过一些。毕竟，文凭只是文凭，我宁愿他们无忧无虑的过日子，也不要他们认为特优成绩就是一切。当然，有好的成绩可以作为事业的跳板，我们理应冲刺，争取好成绩，但是作为学长，我想要他们了解，读书，不只是读课本、读诗书。读书，可以是群体性的活动，让大家有机会一起谈论，更了解同窗人。。。我想，这就是我在华初所领悟到的，所以想和他们一起分享吧。

driving a jeep thru all the new towns...

2008-09-01T21:15:00.002+08:00

been busy learning to drive at kaki bukit these days... i must say that it has been a very unique experience that i would never wanna relive (after another three weeks). not that it isn't enriching. not that it is boring. just that... it takes a lot from me to shrug off all the negative comments that bludgeon me like hailstones. i guess most of you are taking up driving in commercial schools and i think that most of the instructors are nice to you all. after all, 受人钱财，替人消灾. they obviously cannot offend you and jeopardise their rice bowls... but here, no no no, they don't have to placate you because they've received the money to complete the job. and they whack, whack, whack... until people crumble and tear (i'm serious). and it's worse than bmt and sispec?!

sometimes, i really don't understand the way things work. yes, we should endure all the trash that is heaped onto us and strive to excel, despite the difficulties. yet, we are deemed to be condoning such behaviour from the instructors. we want things to be better and we tolerate the worst, but does that make the worst any better? i wish that they could understand all the pain we are going thru, all the mental torture they are afflicting on us, but i doubt they can. which is sad...

OMG so sorry for infecting everyone with the emoness! anyway, hope to see you all at maf, i'll bring citadels :) haha there's supposed to be an alumni-vs-students sports event (which includes fribsee), but we are all so occupied :/ in any case, we don't have to be there to do something, maybe just talk cock like we used to... cya!

buddies.

2008-05-24T08:57:00.004+08:00

haven't written on the class blog for such a long time, so here's one from me! for those who are no longer in bmt, i hope that you guys still check in here once in a while!

i just did peer appraisal a couple of days ago. to say the least, it was something that i didn't relish. for one, i hate ranking people. each person we know has his own character, abilities and fondness for ourselves. to put all that into a score that does not truly reflect the true-friendness/ability to command and work under stress seems to defeat the real purpose of the assessment. determining a person's inherent worth and ordering him relative to the others in terms of competence is a difficult task in many ways.

and to make things worse, my best buddy in the platoon isn't even my official buddy. big-sh*t irony. frankly speaking, i think that i've gotten the worst person in the entire section/platoon. perhaps that is why my bmt life isn't as enjoyable as it should be. yes, he does help out on certain occasions. but my impression of him is more of a chaokheng person. and i'm not alone in holding that opinion. and he is nowhere near endearing with all the kaobei faces and tone he adopts constitutively, the slew of vulgarities that prefixes his every statement and the slamming of furniture when he gets extras. dammit, it almost feels like i have a chao ah beng for my buddy... (sorry had to get that off my chest)

in a sense, that made my job as an appraiser easier. no ambiguities, no regrets. might be seen as backstabbing, but wth, he doesn't even give people due respect and act responsibly. why should anyone be obliged to give him a good assessment?

on the other hand, i have some really nice section mates whom we can talk crap the whole day and not get bored. even though some of them sleep on a different side of the bunk (as we all know, rocky hill has plenty of space for recruits :P), we still spend a great deal of time talking about relationships, training and our future ahead. people who have earned a spot among the best. and the best thing of it all is that they aren't even my allocated buddies, just people who think that not being too negative can be a better way to pass the time and that section mates share more than mere working relationships...

(ok, i have to quit the emo-ness!)

anyway, is anyone organising anything at all? joey was saying something about a get-together, right? sigh i think that i might be getting confinement for the next two weekends. which means saturday bookouts. wonder if i can join in any gathering... in any case, after pop, we can catch up! so please, get something together! thanks to all :D

it has been a long time, hasn't it?

2008-04-10T10:13:00.002+08:00

in about twenty-four hours, i will be stepping on the same soil everyone else stepped on three months ago. it's odd how things passed by so wooozily. never quite had the time to really slack my time away. and now, it's already my turn to take up arms.

went back recently to see hwachong again. nothing much has changed (duh, it has only been four/five months since we left school!) but it seems all so distant. i can't really believe that we have graduated (have we, actually? we haven't gotten our a level certs yet.), yet the fact remains as such. everyone has started working (i even met liqun and chaoyi in school! imagine how many of our classmates are working in hc now -.-). perhaps that's why hwach (rj people calls us 'hwatch'... does 'tch' stand for the chinese high, lol?) seems so unfamiliar.

i still remember how i (and probably a few others as well, incl ys) used to lament about the school. i haven't quite gotten over the idiosyncrasies of our alma mater, but i guess that that isn't the primary concern for most of us right now.

i like the fact that we were a closely knit bunch. or perhaps, closely knit as a cohort. as i spoke to my rj friend about the culture there, i felt relieved that we weren't that way. despite the competitiveness, we were very warm. not as though anyone had to specifically guard against everyone else. we read one another's essays, we have nice little celebrations around school. it's quite a different environment there - no peer reviewing, no family-like atmosphere (wah the big rj farmily!!! WOO!). and besides, in hc, no one is ever too busy to ignore you! so it's actually nice and comforting to know that the teachers are still concerned about you. lol. well, guess it made me a little more appreciative :D

anyway, that's such a lousy parting post. bottomline: miss you all, would appreciate if someone organises something for 7e/ki class. lol. then we can all catch up with one another and map our milestones (in charm's words, "keeping tabs")! haha. cya all in two weeks... if anyone actually does organise something and i don't run foul in bmt.

2008-04-08T12:51:00.002+08:00

rawr rare early bookout (something like 6 am) heh.

booked out for a psychological interview, which was tiring. it's equivalent to baring your soul to a complete stranger for more than 2 hours.

hope everyone's doing fine :)

and heh, lw, welcome to the SAF :P

dinner.

2008-03-01T21:25:00.000+08:00

the evening was filled with the sweet smell of jungle foliage and kids trampled around on the wooden platform. the tables were immaculately dressed in crimson and surrounded by six people, a family reunited.

"so what are you working as, cheryl?"

"well, i'm working as a tutor and customer service officer at mom!"

"what about you, joey? getting up to something lately?"

"nah, just jobless for the moment... waiting to intern at the business times in march. got transferred away from the new paper to the business times. sigh."

"what! why are you sighing! it's so much better being at the business times. at least you write some solid stuff, not tabloid crap!"

laughter roared through the table and the night moved on to a hearty dinner of yummy verandah cuisine - prawn masala, baked fish patties, curried chicken and vegetables, naan and pizza (the last one is obviously NOT indian -.-) - and a greater dose of spicy gossip.

it was quite a rare chance to get everyone (or, at least, most of everyone) to get around the dinner table and have fun just eating and chatting about our lives, triumphs and screwups. though most of the bio guys didn't make it for the dinner, it wasn't short of the familiar warmth that i had come to expect from the company of 7e buddies. spirited conversation, wonderful ambience, delicious food... honestly, what more can anyone wish for post-graduation, when people get increasingly apart from one another as weeks and months slip them by?

for that, i want to toast you all, ladies (cheryl and joey) and gentlemen (yifan, kh and jez), for being such great guests and classmates! thanks for being there so that we could all congregate and have some good j3 fun together, be it munching on spicy savouries, whacking balls at the billiard table to no avail or walking down the hill to the main road and talking under the dim moonlight...

cheers!

long days in isolation.

2008-01-20T15:30:00.000+08:00

hey all! yesh, it seems like i'm the only person manning the blog... thought that the girls would contribute... hmm. it feels almost like a monologue, to tag to myself and only have you guys around online during the weekends...

well, i'm doing pretty fine in the lab! my colleagues are pretty nice people and my boss is quite concerned about me too. haha, and the people in my institute are actually quite... hot. lol! in fact, it is actually the first place where i have seen a researcher turn up for work in a revealing attire... and there's also a lot of freedom here, so i can choose to do what i want and initiate my own mini-projects (as long as i don't waste chemicals and make a nuisance out of myself). there's also quite a number of opportunities for me to take part in their discussions (though the ideas are so high-level that i'm muted by ignorance), which is something i really appreciate as an intern.

anyway, hope that you guys are coping fine with army life and see you guys really soon for a cuppa or something (maybe stj :P)!

Change in meeting time

2007-12-28T21:59:00.000+08:00

Hey guys sorry the meeting time has been pushed forward to 5pm. other details remain the same. seeya tmrw!

gate-crash!

2007-12-28T21:13:00.000+08:00

hey guys! here's the long-awaited info on the jnrs' chalet! sorry for the delay, cos they didn't get back to me earlier -.-

date: 29th dec! (which is unfortunately/surprisingly TOMORROW)
time: 7pm
place to meet: pasir ris mrt control station
place to meet (if you don 't want to meet up before going to the chalet): costa sands pasir ris bungalow B13
what to bring: money (cos they suddenly decided not to have bbq -.-), games and anything appropriate?

cya all tomorrow, before most of you disappear into the barracks/overseas...

Aha! It's blogging time!

2007-12-26T20:49:00.000+08:00

hello everyone long time no post how is everybody merry christmas and happy new year i haven't blogged for a long time in fact no one has blogged in a long time and this blog is pretty dead haha so i shall revive it. here:

Zhi Yang used Max Revive!
*lingliusqie has been revived!*

ok now that we have gotten that out of the way, i can share wif all of u wad i've been up to for the past few weeks:

What has ZY been up to?
i guess it all has to start with the taiwan trip. well i can't be bothered to upload the photos one by one onto the blog so if interested can check out facebook :)
taiwan trip was pretty fun. we were on a bus trip so i was on the bus most of the time. saw a lot of mountains, roads, cars... when we did stop we went to shop and eat :D the chou tofu wasn't too smelly and i liked all the street markets cos they had a carnival-atmosphere. of course, we had to contend wif the crowds and we kinda resorted to rugby tactics to stay as a group.
the taiwan dollar is 1/20th that of one sing dollar so it was pretty fun doing the division cos the cost gets cheaper. also, the gds are pretty cheaply priced so i managed to buy a shirt and a new bag. that was my view of taiwan in general, so here are a few specific moments from my trip:

-On the bus-
ZY: (looking into the mountains) hey, what's that tall tower thing?
ZH: that looks like a control tower
ZY: hmm it's pretty tall.

-Half an hour later-
We walk into the amusement park, our destination, and realise that the tall tower thing is actually an amusement ride called the gyro drop. it is pretty tall. did i mention that before?
anyway the tour guide uses our bravado to his advantage to sabo us to take the ride. i also have a fear of heights. yay.

this fear of heights was drastically diminished when i realised that most of the people taking the ride were little kids. there was *no way* i could look more frightened than the 8 yr old next to me. the kids brokered deals on who got wad if some don't make it back... i think some of them seriously thought it was a life-or-death affair... and we lifted off! thing is designed so that it looks like a giant ufo has kidnapped all of us! slowly, the ppl on the ground start to look like ants...

we finally reach the top and the ride thoughtfully gives us a few seconds to admire the scenery and our own mortality before it drops us in freefall all the way down. i *may* have screamed. if i did, i conveniently choose to believe otherwise. our fall is finally cushioned as we reach the ground. as we stop, air rushes down to fill the vacuum. pretty cool, huh. while my bro and i were still sitting there stunned the kids rushed off to their friends. as we left i spotted this kid who took the ride, staring intensely at this other boy who didn't. a wave of emotion overcame the both of them and they hugged each other tightly. a tender moment indeed.

besides that we also spotted Nono, who took our very same flight home! he arrived in s'pore to grace the star awards =_=

reaching home, my parents shifted from holiday mode to house clean-up mode, dragging my bro and i into cleaning the house... i've been at it for only like 4 days and i'm dead-beat. our jobs ranged from cleaning the outside walls to painting the outside walls. thankfully we had this super jet gun thing that shoots super pressurized water and destroys everything in its path. quite fun to use it actually. but the resultant shrapnel... :O along the way i have uncovered horrific bundles of dirt beneath drain covers, in the corners of walls, in areas untouched by the sun. also, i have battled mosquitoes and spiders and weird creepy crawlies that are probably unclassified as yet. i also saw squirrels :) they try to eat the bananas in the kitchen.

so that, in a nutshell, is wad ZY has been up to. ZY is now waiting for other ppl to post on the blog =_=. the end.

他。她。

2007-12-03T09:13:00.000+08:00

一盒心意
毫不起眼的包装纸
看不透
看不透那陌生人的企图
他嬉皮笑脸
他是不是在有所隐瞒？
我应该有所表示吗？

好唐突
好怪
为何
他送
礼物？
难道
只为
缘分
两字？
纯粹是友谊吗？还是感情？
不懂。

她的笑容
美艳如仙的脸庞
猜不透
她的心是否和我一样
或许她已感受到
或许她的心快了半拍
或许她那冻结的心正在融化
或许她充满了猜疑
或许她看不上我
或许她。。。

不必再想
她的天
我的渊
二月十四的离别
何日再聚？
不懂。真的不懂。
或许明天
或许后天
或许下周
或许下个月
或许明天。

random. lol.

so long, and thanks for all the fish!

2007-11-29T17:29:00.000+08:00

here's what i found while rummaging through my old files:

Ong Zhi Yang 2M17

Definition of a Class

A class comprises a group of people fated for a period of everlasting misery in the prison cell known as the classroom
A class has students, each trying to outwit, outplay and outlast each other
A class has a size limit so that teachers can actually last a full year
A class must have a duty roster and no one to follow it
A class must have a spirit, but its true nature will remain a mystery
A class must have students who stand by each other all the time... to copy homework

haha even then i had a very clear understanding of what a class meant. well there won't really be classes in the future... lecture system means that we won't ever get a large bunch of ppl grouped together. still, it's quite nice to know that while we all had different subject combinations and rarely got together we still managed to fulfil some of my criteria of a class :P

now we're hurtling into the great vast unknown, and we'll probably follow different paths... it will be a dark and lonely path for us all o_0 still it will be cool for us to get back again someday and marvel at how much or how little we've each changed. hopefully all of us will have improved for the best!

oh yes pls attend the final outing on sat... it will be a very significant one, no?

and though time goes by...

2007-11-27T17:09:00.000+08:00

the start seemed like yesterday, the end seems to be racing faster towards the future. have we had our fill of adventures, or are we already stuck in mundane realities? two days have passed in a whizz, but i felt that they were two very simple days, free of expectation, stress and worry... maybe i'll just write a little here, but i'm sure you guys have just as much or even more to say :)

was at vivocity yesterday with rebecca and we were having lunch at this cafe, right next to the mrt. and we were served by this uber-funny caucasian waiter, who kept on winking when we said something. haha... he winked when i was asking about my order, winked when he dropped the knife and did the same when we left and i said, "thanks!" how odd when you only find good service attitude in people you least expect to find it in. not that caucasians typically provide bad service, but you would probably expect to feel at home with a person who shares similar cultural values and attitudes towards others to be a better service-provider... it felt really comforting and welcoming to have a person who tends to your needs after a really long day (at the examination desk). lol.

then, it was a stag party at ps cafe in the evening! haha... it was a fine evening, getting lost and chatty on the way to the cafe. anything and everything transpired, from the dilapidated house by the side of the road to the plans we had to meet up to xbox games that we had yet to play. haha, and not to forget the countless arguments and rounds of voting we had, just to decide what to do after dinner! it seemed such a long time since we last sat around a table for a night of nothing but everything... haha. felt really good when we could just hear everyone out, like little kids who waved and exchanged the bones in their closets. anyway, some pix to add some colour illustration ;)

the place where we had dinner - ps cafe :P

it looks better in the dark.

aaron in his comfy chair after a very expensive dinner, lol.

aaron, wk and ongzy in the dark, sitting away from the cafe, facing a misty pane of glass.

me, looking like a degenerating old brit.

cam-whoring!

ongzy's got aura >.<

and His light illuminates us all (He being the camera la, duh)!

wk, aaron, kh and ongzy. erm, ronald feels a little... repressed. haha!

cam-(male)whores...

well, today was not much of an exception ie it was a complete surprise too! haha... went to malaysia early this morning to embark on the mission wardrobe expansion. lol... had a nice breakfast at a kopitiam found next to a very large half-completed hotel complex (apparently, a lot of buildings are left half-done cos the contractors don't have enough money to finish the projects... what is the government doing?!). guess that really simple stuff and a dose of fresh air are enough to make people feel happy and uplifted? then then then it was hardcore shopping! haha... sounds darn bimbotic, but ya, it was shopping frenzy, lol (and to think i'm not even turning up for prom). talk about sliding down the evolutionary ladder, ys :P and omg, i actually damaged my (dad's) wallet to a greater extent than my mum :/ so much for crash-course pre-xmas outfit enhancement... lol.

haha i just sent some cockroach traps around my estate so that i can get live specimens for dissection this thurs. shall try to see if my entrapment skills have improved ;) for now, enjoy the hols, everyone! cya at class outing on 1st dec (i dunno, that's the tentative date siah...) :D

singing, "here we go again"...

random sampling of my culinary products (no no, there's no pun intended there! don't think too much >.< ):

miso cod! just instant miso paste-marinated cod fish, lol. doesn't taste too bad, haha.

portobello mushroom porridge. yeah, that's the state of it. how interesting, right? >.< it didn't taste horrible, just out-of-this-world :P moral of the story: mushrooms don't require a lot of water to cook/don't cook mushrooms with rice.

heinz tomato soup with mushroom and cheese. the tomato soup from heinz is really darn good, haha... and i did it with a toaster (which is quite a feat, considering i can't control the intensity of the heat)!

the alternative event.

2007-11-24T12:08:00.000+08:00

hey guys! as you all probably know by now, we are going to have a dinner party on monday, 26th nov! here are the details:

place (where we eat): ps cafe (www.pscafe.sg - you can also find the map on the webby, just in case you wanna get out of the place by yourself)
place (where we meet): entrance of plaza sing (then we will take a bus down to "the place where we eat")
time: 6.30pm at plaza sing
budget: $30 is a comfortable sum... one dish is abt $20 (look on the bright side, we can share ;D)... so unless you want drinks, you shouldn't bust your budget...
attire: casual (or smart casual, whichever you prefer)
things to bring: alcohol (if you wish, but i dunno abt corkage), camera (it's going to be a nice night... if it doesn't rain.) and yourself :D

if you guys aren't comfortable with anything/want to comment, just post on the tagboard! cya guys soon (i hope i will be alive then)!

insane stupidity.

2007-11-13T22:08:00.000+08:00

omg i just discovered an email i typed 3 years ago to my chem teacher and realised how stupid/ignorant i was. brrh.

"I found out that chlorophyll can give up electrons to carbon dioxide (WTF - i understood reduction in the wrong sense T_T) when the electrons are 'excited' by light energy.

1. However, can the quantised electrons be given up to the anode as well? (WTF - what a quantum leap of faith...)

2. Also, does acetone or ethanol conduct electricity? (WTF)

3. Assuming that chlorophyll is an electrically neutral entity, then, if it is molten, will it conduct electricity just like the way molten sodium chloride conducts electricity? (WTF)"

yes, go on, laugh.

anyway, on a lighter note, yesterday was pretty fun! dunno if you guys know, but i applied to university of dundee (please tell me if you know anyone else who's applying there... apparently there are 6 to 7 others from hc, all applying to do life science/medicine/dentistry... wow. anyway, that's THE place if you guys wanna do cancer biology, and a*star does have a tie-up with dundee for post-grads to do their phd theses there, so no worries :P), so the international liaison officer came to singapore to talk to the applicants (yeah, maybe i'm just trying to sound important, haha) and mine was the night before, at her hotel cafe/bar. so, she was talking about my choice (mathematical biology, zomg... and she was persuading me to switch to a 3-year honours programme [honours is a must at dundee] cos it's harder to get in, compared to the 4-year one -.- ) and bombarding my parents and myself with loads of details about the university, the course and medicine in the uk (fact: dundee is about 20 000 pounds cheaper than cambridge).

admittedly, i put dundee down cos of a few reasons (not in increasing degrees of compulsion) : 1. i have friends there, 2. dundee is the only place in the uk with something related to bio, not entirely bio and has a good reputation in the teaching of bio, 3. scotland (and dundee, in particular) is a nice place with sunny cool weather and cosiness all around! i think few people develop intense love for a country, after spending just 3 weeks there, but scotland is really a place that can change that. add to that the spirited sales pitch made by the officer, few can resist the allure of education in the highlands :P

partially persuaded and hungry for dinner, we took the discussion offline and went to have dinner at hock lam (yeah, the beef noodles at purvis street! dunno if you guys actually know where it is... we can go there for supper the next time!). it was pretty amusing/daunting to entertain a caucasian at anything but a restaurant (my dad wanted to bring her to taste local food and i thought it was a bad-and-good idea... confucian ethics and general etiquette forbade me from saying anything negative), but it turned out decent, if not, very well - the food, the sounds, the temperature at night, the puffs of cigarette mist from the neighbouring table, the cautious dipping of the meat into the colloid of tangy spice, the relentless struggle between Chopstick and Meatball, the talking that was going round the table. i guess the continuous conversation saved the evening (trust me, there wasn't more than five seconds of silence) and made it an interesting and stimulating tuesday night for me - not just absorbing all the information about dundee and the university, but also observing and noting how things got around and ended on a saccharine note (random but somewhat related: maybe the success of a business conversation is really dependent on your ability to tap on your knowledge of the world and the person you're talking to and your reception to new ideas put forth by the other person... nice.).

nearing the end le, just 4 more exams for most of us... mcq galore! cya guys soon :D

house!

2007-11-11T15:46:00.000+08:00

nice brainless game to train... nothing?

7e family. cute.

2007-11-02T20:54:00.001+08:00

the end is looming and someday (later this month), we won't be seeing the people whom we have grown so familiar to in the past two short but fulfilling years and doing the things that seem so routine...

have been imagining how it would be like, if all of us were in this huge house, living as a huge family (don't get me wrong; we can still have our spouses and monstrous kids!) ... cos it seems as though we are very at home with one another - nothing we can't say, nothing we can't fight (read: argue) over, nothing we can't discuss, nothing we can't share, nothing we can't do together as a class :)

haha... the hypothetical family in my mind:
- the cook: ccy - for all his culinary flamboyance.
- the parents: ys - i dunno, some of you all say that he can be a parent, so ya lor...

aaron, cos he makes a nice dad (patient and reasonable)... ongzy, cos he can discipline kids (yeah, welfare!)?

- the accountant: joey - for the math bit.
- the tutors: kh, ni chen, yf, cheryl

- the proverbial grandfather/mother: wk!

lol, that's so exceedingly random. but yeah... could always rant on about memories and stuff, but we all know what it is within. eek. that's a terrible ending. maybe we'll find a way round it some time later...

the steamer looks like it's smiling. cool :) like i said, it's random! :P

here we go!... (again)

2007-10-27T15:09:00.000+08:00

here's my before-the-big-impending-battle-speech. i'll avoid:

overuse of superlatives
weeping and whining about our lives
scaring ouselves :P
pretending to be totally prepared

yup i'll avoid all that. it's been 2 years since we've been together and we've been through quite a lot, ranging from the boring (random citation of lectures), the fun (orientation, fac camp, bbqs, frisbee), and best of all, the peaceful moments we spent between classes and just talking away. before we head into this final leg of our journey, i'll like to say it's been cool to hang out with all of you, and i've learnt a lot and have become a better person. indeed, i always felt happy that i was surrounded by people whom i can learn from and talk to. haha i guess it's thanks to all of you these 2 years were not simply the transition period between sec 4 and the As, but rather 2 more meaningful years to my life.

i wish you all the best in your As and after your As as well :P have faith!

Grad Night

2007-10-13T16:03:00.000+08:00

consolating pain.

2007-10-11T18:33:00.000+08:00

Alexandr Solzhenitsyn's speech at the Nobel Banquet at the City Hall in Stockholm, December 10, 1974

(Translation)

Your Majesty, Your Royal Highnesses, Ladies and Gentlemen,

Many Nobel Prize laureates have appeared before you in this hall, but the Swedish Academy and the Nobel Foundation have probably never had as much bother with anyone as they have had with me. On at least one occasion I have already been here, although not in the flesh; once the honorable Karl Ragnar Gierow was already on his way to meet me; and now, at last, I have arrived out of turn to occupy an extra seat. Four years had to pass to give me the floor for three minutes, and the secretary of the Academy is being forced now to address the third speech to the same writer.

I must ask your forgiveness, therefore, for having caused all of you so much trouble, and thank you especially for the ceremony in 1970, when your king and all of you welcomed here an empty chair.

But you will agree that it has not been so simple for the prizewinner, either: carrying his three-minute speech around with him for four years. When I was preparing to come to you in 1970 no room in my breast, no amount of paper was sufficient to let me speak my mind on the first free tribune of my life. For a writer from a land without liberty his first tribune and his first speech is a speech about everything in the world, about all the torments of his country, - and it is pardonable if he forgets the object of the ceremony, the persons assembled there and fills the goblets of joy with his bitterness. But since that year when I was unable to come here, I have learned to express openly practically all my thoughts in my own country as well. So that finding myself expatriated to the West, I have acquired all the better this unhindered possibility of saying as much as I want and where I want, which is something not always appreciated here. I needn't, therefore further burden down this short address.

However, I find a special advantage in not responding to the award of the Nobel Prize until four years later. For example, in four years it is possible to experience the role this prize has already played in your life. In my life it has been a very large one. It has prevented me from being crushed in the severe persecutions to which I have been subjected. It has helped my voice to be heard in places where my predecessors have not been heard for decades. It has helped me to express things that would have otherwise been impossible.

In my case, the Swedish Academy have made an exception, and a rather rare one, awarding me the prize when I am middleaged and my open literary activity is a mere child of some eight years. For the Academy there was a great hidden risk in doing so: after all, only a small part of the books I had written had been published.

But perhaps the finest task of any literary or scientific prize lies precisely in helping to clear the road ahead.

And I would like to express my heartfelt gratitude to the members of the Swedish Academy for the enormous support their choice in 1970 has given my works as a writer. I venture to thank them on behalf of that vast unofficial Russia which is prohibited from expressing itself aloud, which is persecuted both for writing books and even for reading them. The Academy have heard for this decision of theirs many reproaches implying that such a prize has served political interests. But these are the shouts of raucous loudmouths who know of no other interests. We all know that an artist's work cannot be contained within the wretched dimension of politics. For this dimension cannot hold the whole of our life and we must not restrain our social consciousness within in its bounds.

From Les Prix Nobel en 1970, Editor Wilhelm Odelberg, [Nobel Foundation], Stockholm, 1971

thought it was an interesting speech, rich with emotion. so here it is, to be shared with all :)

funny videos!

2007-10-04T18:36:00.000+08:00

ratatouille in... hokkien!!! i realised that there are really nice spoofs in hokkien on youtube! go check it out :P

randomness's sake.

ZY's Cooking Adventures!

2007-10-02T20:31:00.000+08:00

man i've been dying to blog something but never found the time to do so... feeling sick of preparation for SATs, i'd like to share with you some of my recent exploits in the kitchen!

it was last tues, and having no morning lesson i felt like cooking something up... a warm stomach makes a happy student! ...unfortunately while i have a flair for eating food i lack a similar talent in preparing it. one can always tell when i'm trying to cook by 1.the smell of charred matter wafting through the house and 2. the trail of destruction that lies in my wake.

anyhow. after boiling some instant noodles (see how noob i am) i decided to spice it up by frying some ikan bilis! just add some oil and fry right? nothing can go wrong right? sadly it *somehow* crumbled into a black mass of carcinogenic evil. do not ask me how it happened.

darn. the pot's stained with... carbon i think. what am i to do? this is a chance for me to use my theoretical chemistry knowledge!

premise 1: that black charred stuff *should* be just non-polar carbon.
premise 2: non-polar things dissolve in non-polar oil
conclusion: add a layer of oil and the black stuff should disappear in no time!

adding oil, however, did not seem to work. maybe more theory is required?

premise: heat increases solubility of solutes
conclusion: heating oil increases solubility of black stuff

so i turned up the heat. hmm nothing happened! rather let down by my theory, i sadly placed the pot of hot oil under the sink and turned on the tap.

ha. i guess u guys know wad happens next...

there was an extremely loud sizzling noise and a column of water vapour shot up to the roof. it was pretty spectacular. (if u want the scientific explanation the water displaced the oil due to density, came in contact with pot bottom, vaporised and shot back up through the oil layer...) of course, the stain still remained, as defiant as ever.

well the ruckus attracted my grandma's attention and we eventually got the pot cleaned. (well *I* got it scrubbed clean... took a while too) i guess this just adds on to my brilliant mis-adventures in making one decent meal. moral of the story: scientific theories are only approximations of reality! more importantly, we're not really sure whether good scientists make decent cooks...

2007-09-30T23:22:00.000+08:00

it was the first saturday after the prelims. i woke up at 10 in the morning to an empty house, and the prospect of having the whole day to myself hit me like a big yellow school bus. The realisation came like an epiphany; i almost turned to theism that fateful morning. The emancipation!

i think i'm a closet introvert. i'm addicted to days like these with no appointments, nobody to entertain, no deadline to meet. for once, i can put down the public 'yunsong' and have a little rendezvous with my private doppelganger. that's not to say i'm being hypocritical when i actually do go out with people. it's just a different need - a need for some time with myself, to reflect, take stock of what i've been doing, and make sure i don't get lost in this hellhole of a world.

anyway, i was deciding what i should do that day. I could try some arrangements on the piano, continue writing the play i started eons ago on a similar day like this, or go on a date with myself. since the prelim exams were just over, i had to strike out the first two as they required excessive neuron activity. and thus, i decided to go on an adventure in the brave new world with me, myself and i.

fine, i admit it wasn't much of an adventure; i just grabbed a novel from my shelf, and headed off to my usual cafe where i lowered myself a few rungs on the evolutionary ladder to a latte-sipping, cheesecake-craving slug. i did, however, make it a point of making myself uncontactable. i left my phone at home, unintentionally or otherwise. The only trace of my whereabouts is a note for my parents telling them that i'm out, and will be back when i am.

This is one of the little decadent pleasures of my life (the novel happened to be "mr norrell and jonathan strange"). A few lattes and slices of cake later, i managed, to my great surprise, to ooze myself out of the couch with a much lighter wallet. and so, all good things come to an end. i got on the bus home.

the bus ride itself was mundane enough -- the same roads, the same buildings. i was actively trying to suppress my thinking about anything until the bus stopped at one bus-stop along jalan jurong kechil. there was a woman in her sixties standing at the bus-stop, clutching her brown leather handbag, with her eyes following her friend/sister/acquaintance/whoever who has just boarded the bus i was on. Oh, her eyes! they looked at her friend, at first with a quiet dignity, as though looking will will her friend into turning her head and wave her goodbye. As her friend moved into the bus, the desire in her gaze turned from a want, to a need, and then to a plea. Then, everything was too late -- the bus moved on. She looked away and then, I didn't see anything in her eyes anymore, but a cold hardness that tells of a silent resignation. Her friend turned, but a moment too late; their eyes never met.

The tragic irony! As the bus turned into toh tuck road, life goes on.

That day, while i was actively trying to keep to myself, her wordless actions cried out, "Be with me!" Whether it be for her fear of loneliness, or just her desire to be acknowledged, our lives juxtaposed each other for that 20 seconds when the bus stopped. I needed to be alone, while she needed to be with someone. I wonder if anybody else saw what i saw, felt what i felt; i have a nagging suspicion that someone looked, but did not see; listened, but did not hear; touched, but did not feel. Then, I thought about other things. Would I still be trying to be alone, fifty years down the road when i'm her age? Or would I be like her, staring at friends on buses in an ardent desire to be acknowledged, to have my presence felt? Would I be with somebody? Would someone be with me?

Suddenly, I was human again.

friends.

2007-09-26T20:08:00.000+08:00

my best friend once told me something that i still hold very close to my heart. he said, "a true friend is someone who is not only able to make positive comments of your actions, but also someone who can criticise you for the mistakes you have made". i hold this as true and useful, because that has really been the mark of the friends who stood by me all this while...

i guess some of you think that i'm really evil to have expressed a particular thought this afternoon. perhaps i'm not as loving/tolerant as you guys and, having been in a uniformed group for so many years, i know that a person can only be transformed through hard work (and sometimes, excruciating pain). imo, the school of hard knocks teaches a person much more than what each of us can do for him/her. it's better than us covering his/her a** all the time and expecting him/her to feel sufficiently guilty and remorseful (thereby encouraging them to convert to the lit side)... i mean, having done so much for so long, you guys still believe in the "education of love"（俗称‘爱的教育’）？ somehow, i know that we are just doing him/her in if we continue to delude ourselves and blissfully assume that he/she will change... sigh.

sometimes, we have to be cruel to be good. i know you guys disagree (being the nice, ethical people you all are), but i'm unapologetic...

宁可我负天下人，不可天下人负我。

Hey!

2007-09-23T11:15:00.000+08:00

Hey! haha armed with my rudimentary skills of cropping, cutting and pasting, I managed to colour the black canvas with pics!To my own eyes it still looks rather... erm... neat! Haha i challenge yall to do a better one!!!!!!

-aaron

post-traumatic stress disorder.

2007-09-21T22:43:00.000+08:00

ah yes! it's finally the end (of the near-end) and i have some time to pen my thoughts! haha... just came back from changi airport (no i didn't fly to phuket and back after an hour), so there are some things that are swirling in my mind and awaiting expression onto this blank slate right now...

walking is a great start to unearthing new things! i walked from school to the bus stop at adam road, from tekka mall to national library and around the airport (ok, those were really useless details)! i guess, when you walk around instead of just passing buildings and people in vehicles, you get to see more, hear more and feel more? when your sight fleets from the black-and-white laselle college to the old nafa and the peculiar, weathered facade of the 戏剧学院, you start to notice things that you have never seen before and things that you never thought it existed in singapore... like, nafa gallery 3 which houses free-for-all installation art and a little, inconspicuous church-turned-art gallery 5 minutes from the crowded temples of rochor... and when you turn your attention to these little gems so stubbornly encrusted in the grime of city life, it feels slightly heartening to know that there are places in this cold world that offer warm refuge and oases of peace to stressed and scarred souls... and not to forget the whole fun bit of discovering creative stuff in a world of re-invention and original mimicry. and all you have to do is walk and see things from a whole new perspective. take a short trip on foot and skip through the sights and sounds of our little land. who knows, you might stumble on a delightful rarity!

speaking of rarities, i discovered a really well-brewed kopi-o at changi airport! totally unexpected, when you consider how things at the airport are usually sickeningly overpriced, shamelessly branded as "made in singapore" and suck hell-lot... i found it at a place called "changi kopitiam" (wtf, so bloody cliched) and God, the coffee was godsend (for a junkie like me) at 9.30pm... imagine the velvety liquid blackness with all its subtle bitterness and beany aroma... haha.

and there were so many muggers at the airport at 10pm! study there at TEN IN THE NIGHT?! they are out of their minds! but honestly speaking, it is a really good place to study at other times (my dad thinks otherwise; apparently to him, a good place to study is a quiet place -_-) - you can mug in an air-conditioned area and look at 1. planes or 2. people when you are bored... so much better than orchard where there are only 1. vehicles (that are all freaking similar! why can't there be more lamborghinis, mini coopers and porsches arnd for us to drool over?!) and 2. equally bored-looking schoolkids and well-heeled bimbos.. zzz. and you can be so near the place you wanna be this moment - in the plane bound for a land faraway from the stone-coloured desk. and if you're bored of people and planes, you can even hop on the skytrain for fun (haha why do i sound so childish... and i definitely sound like an stb ambassador, lol)!

well, enjoy the weekends! how near we are to the very last stop...

(random) i particularly like this soliloquy from anton ego from ratatouille and some parts do resonate with the earlier bit of the entry...

"In many ways, the work of a critic is easy. We risk very little yet enjoy a position over those who offer up their work and their selves to our judgement. We thrive on negative criticism, which is fun to write and to read. But the bitter truth we critics must face is that, in the grand scheme of things, the average piece of junk is probably more meaningful than our criticism designating it so. But there are times when a critic truly risks something, and that is in the discovery and defense of the new. The world is often unkind to new talents — new creations. The new needs friends. Last night, I experienced something new, an extraordinary meal from a singularly unexpected source. To say that both the meal and its maker have challenged my preconceptions about fine cooking is a gross understatement. They have rocked me to my core. In the past, I have made no secret of my disdain for Chef Gusteau's famous motto: Anyone can cook. But I realize only now do I truly understand what he meant. Not everyone can become a great artist, but a great artist can come from anywhere. It is difficult to imagine more humble origins than those of the genius now cooking at Gusteau's, who is, in this critic's opinion, nothing less than the finest chef in France. I will be returning to Gusteau's soon, hungry for more."

let the fearless prevail.

sleepwalking by the cliff.

2007-09-17T12:02:00.000+08:00

[response]

she stood there, as the metallic monster rolled into the abyss. she stood there, eyes fixed on the carriage. and then, the glimmering tail of the abominable machine.

then, her gaze landed on the unknown darkness.

her hand reached for the scarf that was hanging limply around her neck. the soft cashmere sucked her palms vehemently. it was such an unfamiliar feeling. she twitched, and turned to search for another soul. the lift was empty and the escalator was just grumbling to itself. the track rattled in the wake of the beast and made no noise thereafter. and as though she was not quite convinced, she peered at the platform again. the station was still as bare as the cool steel that lay feet away.

no one.

just the ghastly chime of the clock at half past ten and a silent thud. she sat, back arched and head between her crumbled knees.

why? why?

the cavernous orifice answered no question, the response long muted in the rumble of the speeding train. her eyelids fluttered and tensed for a moment. she let a shot of air into her evacuated lungs and felt the scalding napalm cascading down her flesh.

what's there to know?

nothing, the grime-covered ground replied, as it consumed her anguish with thickened dirt. tap-tap, pitter-pat-pat-patter-tap. the darkened bits gleefully swirled in her liquid pain...

noone'sheretolook! mopeinyourownsickeningdespairforallicare! shameonyouhopelessstupidsillyslut!

but.. but... it just didn't...

oh c'mon, shirley! forty years! do you not know better? wake up!

her forearms casually lifted the damp fringe above her turgid eyes. she saw the path ahead. how comforting, she thought. how near, she wondered. how liberating, she dreamt. it was a glistening reality - and it lay within her reach. it was just there, where the silver lining was...

and the knell sounded.

again.

a breath of inspiration.

2007-09-14T17:06:00.000+08:00

this is a clip i chanced upon in charm's friend's blog... thought that it was absolutely fantastic, so i decided to look for it and post it here for your aural pleasure :) had to screen a few clips, but i'm not complaining, cos it is really worth listening to over and over again :P

paul potts (at first, i thought i heard the anglicised version of pol pot - you know, the cambodian dictator?) is this guy who recently won a competition called, "britain's got talent". he's got unflattering looks, a paunch, crooked teeth and every bit as normal as anyone of us (a little like william hung). but he chose to flaunt the one most remarkable thing he had: his voice.

so you must be thinking to yourself (if you haven't watched the clip): what songs does he sing? the most surprising thing (for a talent show for popular consumption) is, he didn't sing any songs from the common genres.

he chose to perform opera.

opera?! for the masses?! i was pretty skeptical until i heard his rendition of "nessun dorma" (the late pavarotti's signature song). i admit that i'm rather unfamiliar with opera and stuff, but the moment he started singing...! i was blown away by his voice - the power, the clarity, the emotion! you could feel his conviction, as though he were the prince immortalised in the song! you could feel his voice pumping your blood through the veins and squeezing the air out of your lungs! unlike charm's friend, i didn't cry (reason being either 1. being a guy, it takes a little more to reduce me to tears, or 2. i couldn't fully appreciate the subtleties of opera. or both :/); i just felt greatly moved. lol.

a guy-next-door with an extraordinary talent. rags to riches? perhaps. but his tale is not a typical poor-kid-makes-it-in-life story. to him, winning wasn't about the money. it was about mending his battered pride and fighting for the opportunity to lead the life he had always wanted and to pursue his dream of being a professional opera singer.

here's the parting statement, which consists of the last part of the aria:

"Vanish, O night! Set, stars! Set, stars!

At dawn, I will win!

I will win! I will win!"

persist and prevail!

desert of angst with an oasis of joy.

2007-08-29T18:50:00.000+08:00

prelims are here, but that's no reason not to write something on the blog... especially when i'm having really strong feelings against the education we are receiving from the school.

incompetence is a sin. yes, and we all know it for ourselves how stupid we feel when an incompetent teacher teaches us. i mean, get a teacher who has an UNSOUND understanding of mathematics to teach the topic that requires plenty of MATHEMATICAL MANIPULATION and STATISTICAL ANALYSIS?! c'mon, even my senior who isn't a teacher can explain how the equations are derived. and you, (presumably) a trained professional in biology and education, cannot even tell me how they come about? this is seriously disappointing.

and wth, i cannot believe the way cambridge admissions is organised. mrs ang, i know that you are a very busy person and i understand that you cannot be at your cubicle all the time. but the least you could do is make yourself available for a particular period of time so that we poor applicants can go and look for you! and certainly, after those years of organising these application processes, you can easily post a factsheet online to help the troubled souls out there... what is the use of being a college referee if you can't even help us with simple things like these? to make things worse, we cannot approach you when we see you (those are the times when you are involved with consultation) because you will flare at us! it is not as if we do not understand the instructions on the application forms. we can't fill them in because they are simply too vague! if being a Senior Teacher means that you cannot do all these, i think that it is only right to let a junior teacher do it. at least she will have more time to dedicate to the applicants and give them a higher chance of success at impressing the admissions tutor. is that too much to ask for? sigh.

anw, 'nuff said. to borrow ys's words, it's just another 3 months of exquisite pain. for now, let the pictures speak of the fond memories we had during our ravaged years in hc...

hmm... didn't know you guys were into *this*

a valiant attempt to make the number-alphabet 7E :P

petals and a muddy pig :P

class exco/bosses.

talk about being unglam >.<

bio kids!

physik kids (actually they are adults, but whatever)!

the pharmaceutical chemists.

the people who BLAST proteins.

bio kids and our *matronly* tutor :D

emo-ing over food (high calorie good stuff!)

the most exquisite gift to a teacher in the history of KI.

a photo in mr lim's room! note: the artist is being obscured by her own artwork :P

good luck to all and stay cheerful (so that you can gimme some of your cheerfulness and optimism later in the week)!

gone shopping

2007-08-25T10:26:00.000+08:00

for those who skipped our outing yesterday:

yunsong, kaixian and i reached ps yesterday to find poor abandoned yifan! apparently the rest left le! so sad! and then u guys hor spend so much time only buy 1 gift =_= luckily, the 4 of us super efficient ok! plus, it was fun to have a all-guys outing again. (no offense to female readers)

with clockwork efficiency we managed to get gifts for the remaining teachers within an hr, just in time for cheesecake at cafe cartel XD. as u can see we played around with the brilliant lighting effects from ps to take some really nice photos :P

science is not geeky.

2007-08-17T20:50:00.000+08:00

finally gotten down to putting some of my ideas on virtual canvas, now that i have some energy to summon after all the revision...

has it ever occurred to you why people (generally) think that scientists are geeks (maybe it's not just the professional scientists, but the science students as well. sigh...)? people seem to view 'coolness' in terms of the subjects you take and your passions and interests. you take literature and econs? "man, you have a bright future ahead, and omg, you are so damn interesting!" tell people that you offer chem and math, and they rattle on about how nerdy you are.

i mean, being a science student/scientist doesn't make you any less capable of appreciating life. people around me who are competent in the sciences and mathematics have diverse interests in music, movies, food (that's me!), games (dota, halo, gta etc.), art and more! just because we handle things in symbols and numbers, doesn't mean that we cannot handle picasso and hitler.

all the misconceptions of the world. sigh.

ITZ BBQ TIME

2007-08-07T21:58:00.000+08:00

IT’S BBQ TIME!

Hi everyone! Here’s all u need to know about the bbq this fri:

Time: 6 onwards?
How to get there:
1. Take 156, 970 or 77 from Bukit Timah rd. the bus will enter 6th avenue and it will go up a slope. Get off at the stop when it goes down slope. Walk into namly garden and then namly drive. (Safest method I think :P)
2. Take 156, 970, 77 from Holland rd. bus will enter 6th avenue. After a long while it will reach a traffic junction between 6th ave and jalan haji alias. Get off at the bus stop after that and cross road. Walk into namly garden and then namly drive.

3. Or, if u can’t be bothered, take bus to Chinese high, walk in thru namly avenue. Walk pass the hostel, sim, the mysterious place with gurkhas and walk walk walk walk until u see a junction where there are shophouses to the left. Walk in till u see namly dr and walk uphill. (erm not advisable… I *so* dun wanna hunt for u if u get lost…)

4. if u are really hopeless at navigation, gather in groups b4 setting off :D

What food will we get?
I ordered some satay otah and sausages… will get more food like baguette… any suggestions? Chen and Joanne are bringing fruit.

How can I help?
Ahh thanks for all the offers to help :D well, I’ve compiled a list!
1. bring more food o_0
2. bring games to play!
3. bring music to create ambience!
4. help with setting up on day itself! (super important who can help in afternoon?)
5. help think of more ways to help!

Yup that’s about it! Any additional queries can be sent via email or sms :P seeya there!

yum.

2007-08-06T20:21:00.000+08:00

hmm. ever wonder what's behind 'food'? is it simply substances we consume for our own sustenance, or is there more to it? you have people who love music, you have people who love movies, you have people who adore other people, so why not food? after all, you can live without entertainment, but you'll die without food (don't tell me you only survive on water). but food isn't really just food nowadays. we look at many more aspects - the marketability, the packaging, the way food is prepared. it is almost an art in itself, yet it remains something quite unknown to the vast majority.

been reading up on molecular gastronomy and it suddenly struck me that we are in the midst of a culinary revolution! haha... there are some really striking aspects that made me see food in a different light :P

somehow, reducing food to science isn't all too bad. i mean, quantifying the crispiness of potato chips as a function of the type of veg oil used, the temperature of baking/frying and the conditions under which they were packaged, isn't really taking out the holistic experience of consuming delectable foods. it's just coming up with a "scientific" way of recreating the experience i.e. being able to replicate the dish for an infinite number of times for the connoisseur's pleasure and the benefit of subsequent generations of chefs. ultimately, we benefit, don't we?

taking a reductionist approach to cooking makes life so much more fun! imagine creating textures by just adding chemical symbols and doing physics in your mind! yeah some people will snort at the idea of manipulating all these abstract concepts when conceiving new culinary ideas. but, do you see the inherent beauty in this? you can come up with new recipes by combining different ingredients and using different techniques - without doing any actual trial-and-error. it takes the hassle out of cooking, and you can predict the product of your culinary endeavour! isn't it amazing? it's similar to mathematics - the rigour and elegance of the theorem you derive, the manifestation of (what some people call) God (His image, His rules etc.) in our world...

yum yum. more gastronomic adventures this fri! lol...

courage.

2007-08-04T17:41:00.000+08:00

some people say that chocolate is the best medicine. others say that morphine is the best painkiller. what do you think? perhaps, writing is a pretty good (and cheaper) therapeutic option...

courage.

what does it bring to your mind? purple hearts? lions? a faceless stranger braving danger to save a girl who has fallen into a canal? unprotected sex with a prostitute? does it surface in a very dramatic way? or, is it really something that happens day after day, night after night?

it can be as simple as saying, "i love you". or the much-feared B-word. how complex is it? as a third party, it's easy to say anything. what if you're the person involved in making that statement? it's difficult to say anything of that nature without taking a step back and thinking of the best way to convey it. the words you can consider using, the way you can structure your words, the tone you can use... some people would say that if you had such a thought-process, you're not really in love (or, non-love, if you get what i mean). they say that love is necessarily irrational and there's no meaning in thinking. but that's not all to it.

it takes courage to say something like this, especially the B-word. courage to use those words you want to use, courage to use the intended tone, courage to bear the aftermath of it, courage to face up to reality. how do people bring themselves to do it so quickly and painlessly? maybe they are really over it, or they never regarded the relationship seriously... if not, i kinda find it hard to imagine how anyone having spent so much time with his/her other half could possibly feel indifferent...

not very coherent right now... have fun anyway! and good luck to all bio ppl for apps test (i shall go mug for it now)!

Those were the days man...

2007-08-02T22:05:00.000+08:00

Strange how your standards change over the years?

Well do I remember my first Principal's address in my secondary school, where the (then) Principal Mr Tham Tuck Meng intoned, "At primary school, 85, 95 marks is the norm; in secondary school you'll be glad with a 55."

Which was partly why I smiled to myself when I heard Mrs Crystal Cheong mention to us Apolloians during the first EC-meet-students session that "if you haven't gotten your first failure so far, believe me, you will get your first Fs."

Similarly I remembered crying (bless me, I was SUCH a perfectionist then) when I couldn't finish a Math Test, which I subsequently got 86% for. Like, DUH! How sick can you get! Whereas I compare with the standards I have now and say "I'll be glad with a pass"!

"Gone were the days when we were disappointed with not getting full marks," said one of my close friends.

"Like, DUH! You know, I used to cry about not finishing a test! Whine about missing out on a Gold!

"Now?? I'm actually jumping for joy with a mere honourable mention!" To which my friend laughed and said, "ya lor. what to do, it's either we have learnt to take things easy, or we simply don't care anymore..."

Talk about lowering standards!

... Talk about lowering standards!

It's too late...

2007-07-30T01:49:00.000+08:00

One day, a manager of a certain interior design company happened to pass by a certain street, where he chanced upon an empty shophouse unit with some men inside, evidently discussing about its renovation.

Upon returning to his office, he instructed his subordinates to go there in their free time to ask about a possible renovation job.

So two of the guys whom the manager had given instructions to had, during their lunch break, deliberately gone to that same street, both for lunch and a chance to look at that unit the manager had mentioned, though they did so separately.

Upon passing by the said shophouse unit, the first guy thought, "I'll explore my opportunities after lunch." And so he went on to a nearby eatery to settle his meal.

The second guy, upon seeing the unit, went straight into the shop and, within 45minutes, struck a deal with the men inside.

The first guy, upon returning to the scene, sighed, "Damn it! Blame it on my bad luck; I'm only a lunch apart from closing that deal!"

-sometimes i feel like the first guy...

end of the beginning.

2007-07-26T19:37:00.000+08:00

yay, finally the proteomics test is over! it was kinda terrible, but probably not comparable to the mental trauma h3 chem ppl get, so i shall not whine (further)!

anyway, first and foremost, thanks to everyone for making my 18th bday a very memorable one! i still remember my first most memorable birthday, which was in scotland. during the camp, we went for a little walk up the knoll to some really ancient ruins. it was in the evening. over two hundred people were making their way up that small hill, to the little area that was surrounded by 4 eroded stone walls. there, the scout leader (it was a scout camp, btw) announced to the rest that they would be singing the birthday song for a person in the sub-camp. and before i knew it, i heard two hundred voices ringing in my ears and calling my name. i nearly cried that very moment. a few days later, when i received an email in scotland from my best friend who wished me happy bday, i actually did cry... but now, at the age of 18, i'm not as emotional as i used to be. but i still appreciate all that you guys have done for me, be it the cake, the kama sutra (yes i will read it, cy, but practising is another matter >.<), a shirt, a weird-looking keychain, citadels, or a simple 'happy bday' (or 'happy belated bday')!

made me realise that although i dun get to see and talk extensively to most of my friends, they will always be somewhere out there to help... seeing so many familiar faces around can be quite overwhelming, but it has a very strangely warm feeling to it... and it's just really comforting.

perhaps one other thing that i have managed to get back after my bday was a friendship which i thought i had lost last year. ever had the thought that the person you wanted to love might just reject your advances and stop being even a platonic friend? well, i did have a taste of that, and, of course, the consequence is no mystery. few words, minimal contact, awkward silence... while i have moved on with life, i was afraid to even say anything more to her. well, thankfully, things have sorted themselves out and yay, she's a real friend again!

haha, ok, i sound darn optimistic... but why live sadly when you can live a full life? :) just be thankful (whether or not you believe in God)!

sick leave

2007-07-24T21:04:00.000+08:00

haha i'm currently stuck at home thanks to fever + gastric combo. thankfully the medicine's powerful and i was already 80% better by this morning... (missed tennis game though) oh but the medicine tastes *horrible*. there's this disgusting thing call lacteal fort which, well, fortifies intestinal bacteria i think. itz in a disgusting colourless powder and you have to dilute it in water to make a disgusting colourless solution. *and* it tastes disgusting. almost made me wanna puke... why didn't the doc let me take yakult instead :(

on the bright side, sick leave allowed me to catch up on harry potter x.x hahaha turns out to be rather gripping stuff, but aren't they like running away a lot...

hmm the KIpedia looks a bit stagnant at the moment. KI ppl! support your classmates and upload something! won't be nice to waste their gd intentions, right? i guess such things take some momentum to start up...

live earth is stupid.

2007-07-07T22:14:00.000+08:00

yeah, i'm saying that, even if i were to risk getting killed by music lovers out there. no, it's not that i don't appreciate the music or anything. in fact, i would like to thank whoever-organised-this-mega-entertainment-event, cos it's like free entertainment for the weekend to see some of our greatest artistes and hear some of the best music ever made in the past century.

but, don't ever sell something as "a campaign to raise the (bloody) awareness of climate issues", just for the sake of sounding politically correct. ya, sure, al gore can wax lyrical about how the concerts have specific but unannounced goals, but ultimately, if we, as individuals, do not even understand what the concerts are for (other than having epicurean pleasures), is it even meaningful to say that it has goals?

i mean, it's so freaking stupid. you're just organising some concert to entertain the masses. i see people flailing their arms and shouting their lungs out during the concerts, i see bands playing their hearts out, but i see nothing being done to the environment, to address the issues the concerts have presumably set out to resolve. it seems as though it is a massive event to provide publicity for the artistes, some excuse to make loads of noise (according to ongzy) and have fun.

roger daltrey said, "Bollocks to that! The last thing the planet needs is a rock concert. I can't believe it. Let's burn even more fuel. We have problems with global warming, but the questions and the answers are so huge I don't know what a rock concert's ever going to do to help. Everybody on this planet at the moment, unless they are living in the deepest rainforest in Brazil, knows about climate change. My answer is to burn all the f*cking oil as quick as possible and then the politicians will have to find a solution." echoing that, i think it's gullible to assume that a rock concert (or a few of them) can change the way people live. artistes aren't even your religious leaders. their words don't constitute doctrine. then, why should i listen? just because i appreciate your music? i get to enjoy free music - that's all i'm concerned with. so what if the temperature's rising? as long as i can get enough of my air-conditioning, i don't have to care about what you say about the environment. it changes nothing in my life. such is the short-sightedness of most humans.

there's way more things to be done, and yet, we are directing our limited resources and little energy to something that does no work at all. sigh... when will people realise the stupidity and redundancy of such concerts? maybe when the earth's so hot, that all our drummers, vocalists, keyboardists and guitarists die, that all our musical instruments reduce to a puddle of boiling lead and plastic. those silly, naive kids will then realise that their little rock concerts did nothing to stop all that...

distraught.

2007-07-05T20:16:00.000+08:00

ah yes, feeling darn distraught after some recent events (more specifically, experiences with some people). seems weird i should use the word, 'distraught', when referring to social experience. when it comes to human relationships, it's probably more common to use 'disappointed' or 'with great dismay' (blah blah), but ya, i'm feeling really lost, confused and, to some extent, depressed now.

apparently, people whom i don't really get along with are treating me as a friend. if i were just neutral about it, maybe it's not such a bad thing - to have more friends, to have a wider social circle etc. but the problem is, i can't help but feel that i'm backstabbing the other person, by trying to act friendly when i'm not.

i'm sure some of us had some experience like that. just that we don't really talk about it, lest we harm another person's feeling. especially if the other person is really indulgent in the belief that you and him/her are really friends...

thing is, is it better to tell the person straight in the face that you don't fancy being friends with him/her? or, do you play along with him/her, to make everyone feel better? (obviously, if i could answer this question, i wouldn't be distraught... so, gimme some opinion leh...)

ah i want my citadels game set!

great my turn to post again!

2007-07-01T19:48:00.000+08:00

hi guys. was just abt to complain abt the dead and rotting jnr class blog when i realised that i was neglecting our own. oops. seems like lw's the only one having adventures these days haha. i'm just trying not to screw up the delicate balance of life.

really sorry that i didn't go out wif u guys on fri. argh seemed like u all had a great time. instead, i went to watch transformers! haha that movie's proof that all u need are big robots, explosions and one requisite hot babe to make a good movie. brings back all the memories of beast wars etc. which was really cool, if u missed out on it.

speaking of balance, i'm continually amazed that people around me can shut themselves up for like 2 weeks at a stretch just to mug. it totally freaks me out. blocks, promos prep period, ppl just mysteriously disappear! i dunno why but i find that i work best with ppl around me. i practically wither without conversation. is this a s'porean thing that i'll face in the future? i seriously hope not. as gd KI students, we all know that knowledge construction works best in a social context. without it thought loses its most powerful aspect: creativity. taking out social interaction is simply punishing yourself for no gd reason. on the funny side, school's almost like halloween everyday since it's practically zombie central.

oh yah i've thought of something cute to do. dunno why but i've got this urge to like get a map and to indicate on this map where all our classmates originate from. that'll be pretty cool i think. (class t-shirt design, anyone?) bet our class is one of the few where we can actually have a gd distribution on a map. might as well make use of it.

gd luck for all physics ppl. and have a happy youth day :P

makes me wonder...

2007-06-28T07:59:00.000+08:00

just being really random! it is really amusing to see adam levine self-censor the f-word when singing it on AI... lol. but this unplugged version doesn't sound as good as the radio version.

well, there's really no need for you guys to wonder too much, after bio tomorrow (and physics for wk next tues), you all are free (like butterfreeee)! sigh, i still have a botanic gardens fieldtrip 2 hours from now, and a 3-hour training session in nus on saturday. and who knows when my microbio prac is coming... been organising fieldtrips for juniors as well, although i have officially stepped down from the leadership. busy month of july...

well, cya guys really soon! probably tomorrow? anyway, good luck for tomorrow! need to settle some stuff in school for scouts. and pls buy my scout tickets! i need heeeelp in disposing of them! :/

life on the southern side.

2007-06-20T22:07:00.000+08:00

hi all! to take all your minds off blocks prep for the time being, i shall post some nice pictures of my fieldtrip to pulau hantu! haha, it's pretty suicidal to go for a fieldtrip 5 days before the blocks, but heck, it's worth the experience. you probably can't go to the island for 1. free, 2. the chance to go there with qualified experts on biodiversity (not just the professors, the ibo representatives too)!

the four of us at keppel marina! we were waiting for the bumboat to come and fetch us... nice weather with grey clouds!

hmmm. do you know where this place is? looks like a nice chalet at loyang, right? it's actually shell corp's staff apartments! omg...

these are corals (if i remember correctly)! never imagined that singapore still has such stuff, right? try to spot the crab :)

see the blue creatures over there? they are called sea squirts! they are invertebrates that squirt water (duh) ... but they are classified with the other chordates, cos they are more closely related to them, compared to other invertebrates... see how crappy h2 bio is? :P

a barnacle!

topshell! it's supposed to be edible, but you don't wanna try it... after all, it's near pulau bukom and those islands with refineries :/

more corals (that's what the others say, i'm not very sure la... i prefer using a microscope to see)

limpets! they are like abalone... btw did you know that abalone are molluscs too? the thing that you are eating is the foot and part of its visceral mass (the cholesterol-laden bit)... yum... imagine snails :)

more corals! beautiful balls... :x

this is the result of being too gey-kiang... the coral larvae move too high up the shore and colonise the rocks... temperature rises and the algae that were symbionts of the coral leave. and viola, bleaching occurs...

sponges! some of them have interesting interactions... for example...

these brittle stars (not starfish; they belong to the same phylum but different classes) hide in the sponges for refuge!

pink snail! it went back into its shell when i pressed the shutter. bleh...

well, that's it! enjoy the pix and treasure life (and appreciate biology, lol)!

animal planet.

2007-06-18T13:41:00.000+08:00

it had been a very tedious period during those few days. training from 0900 to midnight, inclusive of 2 hours' worth of break. the mind being challenged everyday, every minute, every statement uttered by the profs. doing questions and reading campbell (omg, just die la... pls be happy that h2 syllabus doesn't cover campbell cover-to-back) after training, doing questions at night, when no one else is awake. when two cups of kopi-o/kosong does nothing to stop you from yawning in the morning, you know that it's one hell of a training.

if that's bad, add to that the whole thing of coping with people. it's fine if you have 4 other people who are seriously enjoying the process of training (i know that's kinda ironic, but really, you CAN and SHOULD enjoy dissections, practicals and lectures) and belong to the type who can mug and play. but no, they are, in the words of a particular professor, "darn uptight". i had to convince people to play (like, OMG... but maybe that's why i became the reserve - play too much, do too little). the only time when they really spoke up was during formal training; there wasn't anything much beyond biology and science that transpired at other times.

maybe you think that i'm just being sore... but, to me, the biggest problem is not with the proficiency of the other team members. in fact, i respect them for being so knowledgeable and i admit defeat. the only thing i have qualms with is the way we are going to be seen overseas. sure, some foreign competitors will be very muggish (read: china, america (full of chinese immigrants anyway), korea, taiwan, thailand), but how are the singaporeans going to engage the others, who are interested in having fun? surely it's not through studying campbell together... my point is, the olympiad is not just the competition. there's a reason why it lasts 7 days - it's for you to make full use of your free time to have fun, appreciate others' cultures and immerse in some form of (perhaps, scientific) fellowship.. if all they are concerned with are medals, well, so be it... you only lose a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to create a spectacular showcase to the world, that's all.

people can also be so freaking insensitive at times. maybe it's because there's lack of female presence in this year's line-up, but that's not a good reason for being indifferent to others anyway! besides the whole not-saying-thanks-when-you-should thing, it is also gonna be very appreciated if you can control your anal sphincter muscles during a lecture... imagine emitting some noise from your dorsal posterior end (sorry, can't help putting in some nice, cheem-ified biological terms here :P) during the theory test, what are the other delegates gonna think? unless you have some bowel incontinence, i hardly think that this is appropriate. sigh...

sometimes, when you screw up, others tend to look very interested all of a sudden. especially in a competitive environment, people don't crowd around you to see how little you have bungled, but how much you have screwed up. they want to know how worse off you are, compared to them. quite saddening, isn't it? oh well, i guess most of us have been through that phase, some time or another, as either the onlooker or the person who screwed up. i rather you look nonchalant all the while, rather than be dao at the beginning and then concerned in the end... ignorance is bliss.

sigh, had to let it off my chest. been troubling me for the past two nights...

wow what a week

2007-06-05T21:44:00.000+08:00

this has been one action packed week for me. just found out that both my comp and i got infected with viruses... i'm now down with flu and typing from my bro's comp... haiz zhen1 shi4 huo4 bu4 dan1 xing2... shall try and type while fighting drowsiness at the same time!

first off, with all the nice show's i've been watching. anyone caught the blue planet on arts central? amazing stuff. saw this humungous great white shark (size of my bedroom) swallow the tiny adult seal... wow. entire shark burst out of water like this giant... giant... well it was really big... and just when i began to feel sympathetic towards the poor seals, they showed footage of them eating penguins. followed by penguins fighting penguins, engaged in bloody combat... so much for happy feet...

aand i watched shrek 3 as well! given the kiddy nature of shrek the cinema was filled with tons of families with children in tow. normally children are sweet and endearing and stuff. but when they come as a mob :S doesn't help that they're wearing ogre ears, either... my own family was watching too... including my grandparents. huh? my grandparents?
(in chinese)
ZY: grandma, are u sure u know wad we're watching?
grandma: yah, the one with the green thing and the donkey in the macdonalds ad.

ah. the power of advertising.

liangwei's bbq was fun! think lw and i mastered the art of roasting the perfect marshmallow! crispy caramel on the outside, pure liquid sweetness on the inside... muahaha. liqun and co. got lost when looking for the gate of his condo, which was pretty funny except that i topped her act when i thot that a metal screw was the button to open the gate. furiously pushing the screw, i didn't notice the big switch behind me... to be fair, that was one suspicious looking screw!

helping out at chestnut drive is/was pretty fun. first day was a bit weird though. felt like i was talking to myself cos the students didn't pay attention. now i know how ms wang feels x.x engaged in monotone for like 1 hr plus while the students exchanged sympathetic looks. haha. today was better though. decided to go on the attack and ask them qns instead to check their concepts. so yeah it was pretty fun on the whole. u guys should go too! will find out how tough it is to explain stoichiometry :O

okay going to faint now... very tired. hope that kept u guys mildly entertained. seeya.

thnks fr th mmrs.

2007-06-05T21:24:00.000+08:00

one night and one more time...

how time flies. it's just another 5 months before we are all out of hc - guys in the army, gals working/having fun travelling/mugging for uni admission tests. it's still vivid in my mind, orientation, cny, fribsee, badminton... and most recently, our little snj (seniors and juniors) bbq at my place. it's nice thinking about the past and the memories that have amassed...

aaron was asking me to describe the bbq to him today. when i failed to give an (exciting) account, he said that i was 'sian'. but really, aaron, words cannot fully express all the emotions...

it's something that you've gotta experience for yourself. second-hand accounts hardly bring the atmosphere to you. although it was just a simple bbq (the only pre-bbq events were pkmn cards, cos the tennis court was already in use by others), it meant a lot to many of us. for one, it's the first time we actually had the prcs with us without any pressure of tradition (by this, i mean, having to fulfill the stj and jts 'requirements'). they were really nice, tending to the fire all the time, turning out consistently tasty food and being very engaging throughout. we don't get to see one another often, as it is. all the more we should treasure it, shouldn't we?

besides, it's probably our last outing as seniors/juniors-in-jc. although it was a rather dismal turnout for the junior class, i really appreciated those who bothered (i use this word, because i do admit that bedok is not the most accessible of places) to travel all the way, just for dinner. it was extremely pleasurable to talk to you guys and crap about everything under the moon, from kx's stay in hobart to the imba-ness of ongzy's and my roasted marshmallows! keep the spirit high, we still have 5 more months to make good use of ;)

sometimes, we have to make a choice. either cca or studies. either cca or class. either gal or family. strive for greater heights, or maintain status quo. the world is harsh and brutal; there's rarely any chance for a person to have both worlds. for one experience, you will have to give up other equally enriching experiences... it's just a way of life. ultimately, choices maketh the man - you live for your right choices and with the not-very-right ones...

even though they weren't so great...

a screwed up philosopher.

2007-05-31T09:46:00.000+08:00

hello, everyone! happy vesak day! anyway, that's not what i wanna say with this post...

against better judgment, here i am, blogging, rather than counting atoms and electrons in the stupid chem notes. sigh. but i guess most of us have pretty hectic holiday schedules... is there a sense of fulfillment there? i hope you guys are feeling good about working :)

hmm. the paradox of work. isn't it quite interesting that humans cannot enjoy life to the fullest without work? we whine all day long about working, but when we get to rest and relax, we start thinking about work again... it seems to form part of our survival instinct, i suppose. we have to constantly deliberate over our decisions, so that we don't get caught unprepared in times of crisis... especially in this dangerous and chaotic world, where everyone else is finding an opportunity to put you down, there's hardly any real chance for us to actually rest; there is a constant need for us to strategise, to think ahead. the human mind is hardly at rest.

i'm pretty awake right now, thanks to a macs bagel and two cuppas... wonder if the salt and caffeine are doing things to my head.. increased alertness? (amanda chong should try it before the ki blocks and see if it makes her get a perfect score :P oh the ki trinity - amanda, bernice and the holy karen) many thoughts swirling in my mind, no thanks to the sheer number of activities this week, next week and the week after next...

thinking about yesterday's coffee session with aaron, yifan, hao chuien, ongzy and shou hao, the whole topology thinggy... quite enjoyable, although the topic was rather intellectual (again, no thanks to the human topology innuendoes)! maybe the aroma of coffee opens up people's minds, haha... i'm still dreaming of a nice bio project that can earn as much as vaintrob :P [this para is quite random, so don't think too much over what i said... it's just showing how much i enjoyed the conversation :D]

anyway, has anyone felt unappreciated recently? i guess i have been doing a lot, but people seem to take it for granted... hmm. i think that that's how most of our service staff are feeling - underpaid and severely mistreated. the papers says it, the news programme says it, but no one really gives a heck what the media has to say (usually i don't give a damn either, but this one is painfully relevant) about singaporeans' service dna. it isn't just about singaporean staff's attitude towards their clients, but also the way we, as consumers, treat the people who serve us.

true, there are examples of poor service everywhere we go. but was it like this, to begin with? as individuals, people start out, passionate about serving their customers and trying to meet the clients' needs. however, when these customers appear to be taking their hard work as a consumer's right (rather than a privilege), they don't feel for the job anymore. really, i was in the same situation as well. i volunteered to do all the coordination and liaison with the lecturers because i felt that i had to fulfill an obligation to the team. reminders in the form of emails and smses (mind you, it isn't cheap when you have to send out so many at the same time), and what do you get in the end?

no one seeks rewards consciously, but what they really want is a word of thanks. not censuring anyone here (lest i sound like a particular tutor), but really, some people lack the EQ to even recognise other people's efforts. if someone thinks that what you are doing is peanuts (not an allusion to durai, ok?), let him/her do it. coordination and liaison aren't as simple as "contact lecturer, compare schedules, find common slot, arrange lecture. case closed". if it were so mechanistic, there won't be frustrated secretaries and vexed scribes in this world - you can just leave it to a computer. in fact, if you were to ask me, i think that a secretary is really more busy than his/her CEO boss -he/ she has to keep track of so many more things! but even that is a special case - secretaries are paid to do it. but poor volunteers like me, and so many exco members in school ccas? they don't get a thing! at the very least, exco members get to glorify themselves in their testimonials, but i? i'm not even guaranteed a place on the team; i still have to mug! grrh. to top it all, not everyone is thankful that there is actually someone coordinating...

how many people said thanks? hmm. two? how many times, then? erm, thrice in two months? that's sooooo comforting. even my teachers and best friends bother to say, "hi liangwei" before a message... it's basic respect for others and a subtle display of self-respect. it's disturbing how indifferent our peers can get. people can just write an sms, like, "can you tell me when this-and-that is happening? it's not convenient for me to go online to check it." dammit, i don't owe you people any favour! you don't even have to write the word, "thanks", explicitly (i know how some people see that as a form of weakness/gaiety, but whateva, you can't have both ego and humility); you could have said something like, "could you please send me the info" or "could you kindly tell me over the phone", that implies some form of appreciation. but nooo, you wanna demonstrate your brahmin superiority over me, so that i know my place as an untouchable...

sorry for writing all these... in a very emo mood now, with all the maroon five and fallout boy music... sigh.

30 days of sun, sand and... er, notes?

2007-05-25T19:50:00.000+08:00

Rejoice, people, for the holidays are here! =DDD

... ok maybe for the majority of you (I'm not naming who, I'm just stating the comments I heard from people in our class -.o) JUNE HOLIDAYS = INTENSIVE MUGGING...

indeed there was this extremist one which made me shiver: "I prefer school... at least there's recess and break, you know? At home you mug like there's no tomorrow..."

ok i noe blocks are important, and we have to mug for it, but, really, is there a need to be THAT intensive? =0 given you guys' intelligence I don't think so lor! =D

... anyway do spend the holidays wisely; mug but do spend time for play and leisure as well, because the rest of the year is probably mugging, revision, mugging, revision, ... as Mrs Irene Tan posted on the SMB for the physics students, she told us to "ENJOY our 18 (now 17) weeks of school when you return..." already getting ready to send us away... -.o

... and everyone please go for the BBQ if you can, don't let Liang Wei down... although i know he's going to say i'm being hypocritical and being the black pot, calling you guys kettles...

lastly, to everyone who's going overseas/travelling, have a safe trip! =)

overrun, overtaken.

2007-05-23T19:46:00.000+08:00

back from ethology! it was pretty dry today... maybe cos it wasn't presented by mr ngoh, the very enthusiastic zoology/dae teacher :P or maybe cos i was too freaking tired from the 3.5 hour break+1 hour math tutorial-cum-lecture+1.5 hours of lame and suspiciously gay nippon entertainment...

ah, now that there isn't much to do for school work, i have gotta concentrate on olympiad (or, as a very nice and congenial professor pronounces it, "biolympic" :P). going all out for this one... carrying files and books on any and every biology topic, getting a (freaking ex - 24 bucks to be exact... i better become a doctor in the future) dissection kit, doing questions over and over again, digesting campbell like some earthworm (oh, poor earthworm! the story of thou being dismembered into 12 segments has yet to be told to the world out there!) on drugs...

it's insane how much all that biology is getting into my system. when i was at nus just now, i met this 99s71 senior from hwachong (hey it's really a coincidence!). she asked me a question, "what class are you from?" and the first thing that came to my very-sensitive-to-biological-terms mind was, "class? you mean the kingdom-phylum sense of class?" it almost seemed like an instinct to think that every question out there is an ibo question in disguise... that's damn revolting. and it's almost like *** picking on every opportunity in ms wang's tutorial class to convert some utterance to a not-very-effective pun (you guys get what i mean and who i'm referring to; don't wanna mention names here lest i lose him/her as a friend)... now statements like, "what would you like to order?" and "this plan complements the current scheme", makes me go into campbell-land and bio overdrive. good grief...

thank God for the hols... i can go and sort out these matters and spare you guys from the hiroshima fallout of biological nukes (hmm, reminds me of scud storms :P)! ah... when i think of the bbq - the prawns and squids, the image of the dissecting tray with pinned specimens floats into my mind...

biologist's horror T_T

anyway, on a lighter note, i have finally gotten down to planning the bbq!
so...
remember...
3rd june, afternoon till evening...
anything from cycling to swimming to tennis to frisbee to sauna to playground entertainment...
$10 pax (it's just to offset the food cost - see my previous post on bbq!)
a night when 7e seniors and juniors come to enjoy themselves! :)

cya guys!

bbq in june hols! :)

2007-05-02T17:08:00.000+08:00

hi everyone! i have finally managed to book the bbq pit on the 3rd of june! hope it will be a nice fine evening :) the last bbq we had was pretty nice eh? haha besides the massive abuse of alcohol, that is...

anyway, what would you guys like? i'm not going to order too many chicken wings (perhaps, about 20?) this time round. if you wanna have more, just tell me k (or tag)? i'll be getting more of the stuff-on-skewers, so that we can walk around and chat :) if anyone wanna contribute some food e.g. dessert, fried vermicelli, fruits, alcohol (red wine, vodka) etc., pls tell me! then we can save a sum there :P

the cost won't be too high... i promise to keep it around $10 pax. last year, we had pretty good food, for such a price, so don't worry about the quality :P besides, with fewer chicken wings, i can direct funds to food that people are willing to eat... perhaps we can even get mussels and crayfish >.<

just bring skewers and yourselves (don't worry, you're not gonna get skewered - unless it's your bday, muahaha!) for a day/night of communion (lol, i can't resist making some religious references :P)!

On what might have, or could have been...

2007-04-30T23:20:00.000+08:00

Just my 2 cents' on this whole issue about spirit and stuff... Sorry ongzy for getting so flared up at that moment when I tagged... =S but yeah, it does get to your head sometimes...

ok, granted, if you really feel for your fac/group/school etc, the "spirit" will naturally be there... the passion you feel for your CCA/class/school, if indeed it is real and genuine, will spur you on to fight/strive for glory, be it personal or as a group.

to me there's no real need to GATHER "spirit"...

but what really galls me is the fact that people, in their aimless quest for this "spirit", go on to do whatever they can to achieve it, be it highlighting the stupid apparent "hatred" we have with another JC, Apollo vs Ares, etc, etc... even designing some stupid jacket so that we have a "common identity"... as if.

to me, at least, this spirit thing is very 做作, because to me, at the end of it all, 95% of those who rooted for it wouldn't believe in it, and 99% of those who are convinced about it will tend to forget about it eventually.

spirit, my ass. call me dispirited if you will, but i nvr set much store by this.

...

on a separate issue, however, we (meaning my mother and my sister and brother and i) were discussing about the poor girl who drowned whilst retrieving her handphone blah blah blah, i'm sure most of us here know the story by now...

the conversation went something like this:

Sis: 哎哟，不会游泳还硬撑，要下水拿电话!

Elder Bro: boh bian ma, 她下去拿的时候，水还很浅, but suay suay 下去的时候雨就下的特别大...

Mum: (gist of her narrative was that there was this myth that every now and then this river (or canal, if you like) god would take one or two as sacrifices... it's the same river, everytime, the one from bukit batok to pandan, which, depending on whether you believe it or not, sounds arguable..)

Me: (if you know me well you'd have known that i'm quite careless, i've lost 3 phones so far... but that's not the point) boh bian ma, 怕被骂，才下去拿的！

Just then the stupid principal of her school said something about losing valuables means nothing compared to losing a life, in a voice that plainly told us that she didn't feel anything much... but that is again arguable... her parents said something to the same extent, which prompted me to say...

Me: neh, 如果不见了，回家，肯定 kena tekan! 死了才来说，不用紧, as if lor!

...

point being that life is full of irony. isn't it poignant that when you're alive, people lament your loss of material wealth, but when you're gone, people voice their belief that life is more important than any kind of wealth?

is this just human nature playing its role? of us wanting the best of both worlds?...

sorry for bringing this up, but just what i've been thinking about the previous week and since i have nothing to do, just sharing it with you... sorry to those who think i'm making fun of the poor girl's death; i'm not, and i'm sincerely apologetic if this has affected any reader in any way (ie those who were directly/indirectly related to the girl)...

comp stuff...

2007-04-26T22:06:00.000+08:00

a recent discussion with a friend of mine brought up some more interesting issues on team spirit, competition, and etc. hmm i know i haven't said much abt my comp experience so i'll share it with everyone now...

the interesting thing abt wushu competition is that it seems like an individual effort. unlike a performance, u are responsible for the 1.5 min u spend on the carpet on competition day. and apart from other ppl doing your routine, no one else can really help you out...

in many cases, it *is* an individual effort. all too often, you see 1-2 individuals with exceptional abilities single-handedly win the title for their school... makes u wonder abt the value of a team trophy... but anyhow it is easy to just see competition as an individual challenge, of no consequence to the team...

funny thing is,i felt closer to the team during competition than during the performances... in the sense that for once u are not like taking care of others... everyone learns to take care of themselves... and you realise that these ppl are not liabilities... but actually ppl who do have some fighting spirit... and i guess u can empathise more when they share what you experience for once.

i guess that experience alone merits the entire competition experience. a very interesting thing i noticed abt the recent competition results is that we always assume we are the best... and that there is some shame in loss. i don't really feel that there is any shame in losing a fair fight. maybe it is cos all the competitors for an event line up together b4 we go on the carpet... maybe it is cos i can see the pressure and nervousness on their faces too... and maybe it is cos i actually admire some of them for their technique... anyhow, if there's a winner, there will be losers. it is silly to assume that u will win everytime, especially if u know your opponent and you know your own limits. beats me but if i win my event cos my opponent was good but messed up or something like that, i won't really feel that happy...

hmm a lot of my thoughts aren't very clear at the moment--> and this is probably my most lucid distillation... but i feel that since this is probably my last comp effort... i might as well appear mature for once and accept everything with a calm and peaceful frame of mind. in the end u realise that what u gain is much much more than just a simple medal on your neck.

apollo, proed, thoburn.

2007-04-23T21:13:00.000+08:00

talking to a few people about fac and sch spirits in the past days (wow) made me think more about the failures of hc and the successes of other schools in this aspect. for the benefit of those who do not know, thoburn is one of the houses in ac, and i used to be in it :) anyway, that's not what i'm concerned with right now.

look at the title. they represent three concepts, adopted by three different schools (i assume that hcjc and tchs are fundamentally distinct entities), but somewhat homologous in function. that is, they serve to segregate the school population in some manner. but the extent to which we are segregated varies, when you compare all three ideas, with the faculty system causing the greatest divisions.

in my opinion, the whole concept of having houses/consortia/faculties was to group classes together to facilitate certain administrative matters. for example, having coordinators for each faculty helps to relieve the administrative burden on the school exco. the secondary purpose of having such systems was to have a systematic way of running events. for example, when the school is down to support the track team, each faculty can cheer, one by one (i know that it sounds idealistic, but that might have really been one function of the system!). or rotating certain responsibilities among the various houses/faculties/consortia (think about things like rotating chairmanship within asean).

but what results in a faculty system is that too much is being brought down to the fac level. many events (that people wanna participate in) are done by the fac com e.g. fac outings, rehearsals for cny dance competition, wargames etc. even if major events are done by the students' council, many people still see the events as things organised by "X from athena" or "Y from artemis" etc. the pride students have lies in the fact that "X from athena" or "Y from artemis" is the person-in-charge (which means a coup for the faculty, if you would like to think so), rather than in the competency of the chairperson. if so much are being done (or are perceived to be done) at the fac level, i find it hard to even have a school spirit.

now, contrast this to ac's house system. the only time when houses have meaning is the time when their athletes are competing in the intra-school championships. at all other times, the students' council organise events for the entire school, without a single mention of the houses. because, the fundamental purpose of student-led activities is to encourage participation by EVERYONE, not just students from a particular house. there's no practical need for segregation of the population for such activities. by resisting the temptation to decentralise control of the school, it seems to me that ac people have succeeded in creating a strong school-wide identity and the indomitable acsian spirit.

on retrospect, i identify myself as an acsian and a chi high student. but, for now, i am only an apolloian.

spirits that linger on the hwachong hill.

2007-04-22T11:39:00.000+08:00

not quite in the mood to write anything for my is yet, so here i am, on the blog! thought that it would be pretty interesting to comment a little on what the school has been up to lately...

wonder if anyone has noticed, but the school seems to be talking a lot about spirit, spirit and more spirit (for the uninformed, please go read your emb, and you'll probably get half of what i am saying :P). ok, ignoring the ineffective pun in my entry's title, really, what is the spirit that we have been looking for all this while?

it might be useful to think of the word, 'zeitgeist'. it basically refers to the spirit of an era, for the poorly-versed-in-german individuals like me. if i'm thinking it the right way, we are in the midst of a paradigm shift (in education, that is). the uncertainties of ip, our dreadful expectations of the a levels, the pressures of the school upon our batch. then, perhaps, the spirit that we are referring to, is one of fighting, one of excellence.

the spirit of resistance, and the orientation of ourselves in these chaotic times.

perhaps, you might say that i'm just making a caricature of the current situation. but, take a moment and think. is that what i'm trying to say?

my point is, in the midst of all these educational reforms and talk about having a unified spirit, the original "spirits" have vanished. chi high's motto is "自强不息". looking at this motto, beyond its basic notion of resilience, it implies some form of individualism. now, look at hcjc's motto, "live with passion, lead with compassion". no doubt, the "live with passion" part does contain the individualist idea of cest la vie, the relentless personal pursuit of pleasure and happiness in life. however, once you couple it with "lead with compassion", conflict arises. leadership essentially means some organisation of society. how would a person (chi high guys, in particular) reconcile his individualist ideas with this whole new notion of leadership and social responsibility? as we try to bring about this reconciliation, we lose some values that we have picked up in chi high and assimilate some from the hcjc environment. the questions any one of us in the ip has to ask in the end is, "are we complete? are we perfect chi high and/or hcjc entities?"

when the school admits that there is a (possibly) unbridgeable gap between faculty spirit and school spirit, as well as one that exists between chi high spirit and hcjc spirit, what are we left with, and what ought to be questioned? the thing is, the adminstration of both sections of the institution are concerned with different goals. why are people more supportive of the faculty concept? after all, hcjc and faculties are but discourses in our minds. and hcjc has a stronger presence to the rest of singapore, compared to ares, apollo, athena or artemis alone. so, why can't we translate (or why haven't we translated) the passion for our individual faculties into love for our school? or why can't we love hcjc the same way we adore chi high?

my guess is that we are used to some autonomy and liberal-mindedness in the way we conduct our lives in school (individualism, i guess?). sure, we had disciplinarians in chi high as well, and there were plenty of rules to abide by. but, at least, we had the freedom to do things, be it wacky or sensible. we don't try to ascribe some political correctness to the way we do things. we could cheer for a friend in the auditorium in chi high and not get chided for it. we could obtain support (perhaps, much faster) for activities we would have liked to initiate. we could stay around in classrooms much later (till about 6pm when the guards had to pull down shutters, or until some cca group wanted to use the room) and do work/play com games/sleep. we could exercise our options when it came to public lectures, self-study sessions etc. we aren't forced into things. and even if the event was compulsory, the teacher or person-in-charge makes an effort to highlight the benefits of attending (e.g. credit points, free food :P). but here, in hcjc, so many things are done against our will. we have to attend lectures that don't make any sense/benefit us, we have to give self-addressed envelopes for results to be mailed to us, we have to tolerate programmes that we have no wish of/need for attending (e.g. a-star math lecture series)... the list goes on. someone might reply that this is all being overly idealistic, to always have options given to us. i'm not asking that we always have options, but, at the very least, the administration should only make compulsory those events that are HIGHLY relevant to a specific group. trying to make a one-size-fits-all solution only foists structures upon us that stifle creativity and thinking.

it is also much more economical for an individual to make his mark at a lower rung of the hierarchy. how so? is it not easier for a person to organise a faculty outing, compared to the task of organising prom? people are willing to invest time and/or money in the whole concept of consortia and faculties, because it ensures a higher chance of success with a proportionately lower amount of effort. add to that the fact that there is much more red tape waiting to trip a school councillor, compared to a fac com member, it is only natural that we seek the easier way out to achieve a "worthwhile" success. in this sense, it is much more worth it to accommodate the idea of "faculty" and keep it at that level, rather than elevating it to "love of the school". glory for the school is best left to the more talented minority to achieve in other niche areas.

to hazard a third guess, i think that the administration on both sides are misguided with respect to that "institution spirit" that they would so like to have. it is ridiculous to think that all it takes to form a unified hc spirit is a jacket designed by a hwachongian for all hwachongians. it is naive to think that an institution can share the same vision, just by inventing an umbrella name for two distinct educational bodies. materialism won't bring us anywhere near that ideal goal of a unified hc. only when both chi high and hcjc (basically, every single teacher, student and administrative staff in the institution) agree upon some common normative principles and vision that are not merely phrased in a feel-good, castle-in-the-air manner, can a true hci exist.

but for now, the best that we have is aptly described on the walls facing bukit timah road, "Hwa Chong Institution, incorporating The Chinese High School and Hwa Chong Junior College".

mere incorporation, not integration.

bbq in june hols!

2007-04-17T21:13:00.000+08:00

hey everyone! i guess the title is self-explanatory? lol... i was just thinking of having a bbq (at my house) on either the 9th or 16th of june, before our intensive mugging for blocks and prelims and *gush* the a levels! bleh... anyway, here's what i have in mind:

people: our class, ki class and junior class (is this too ambitious? cos i was thinking that many people would be either holidaying or going back to their homeland... so we have to draw on a few more "groupings"...)

activities: essentially, xbox (i only have two controllers *hint hint*), pokemon cards (lol lol lol), swimming, tennis, gym, (mini-)arcade, jacuzzi, sauna, and whatever's on offer at east coast park (which includes sandcastle building, frisbee and fishing...) :P

plan: order plenty of food-on-sticks/skewers, cos nobody eats chicken wings T_T if you have a penchant for those modified limbs, please tell me in advance! oh, can play sparklers too, haha :P

please tell me when you guys wanna have it, and i'll go book it asap (lest some other person decides to foil my plan...)!

btw my house is in bedok, near tjc... so yeah, have some mental preparation if you decide to venture to this ulu part of s'pore >.<

imcb rop

2007-04-13T21:24:00.000+08:00

the past 3 days have been a nice sabbatical from school, although most of those who have participated would have known it to be more of a process of waiting, rather than doing real work. besides, i learnt more at imcb, than from you-know-who h3 lecturer!

at imcb, i was reminded of that similar workshop in 04 (remember, ys? >.< nostalgia...) when i first met people like ys, sarah and ccb. i was such an impressionable chinese high kid, impressed by all those gadgets and advanced equipment. it was a whole load of fun, because i not only had the chance to acquire skills necessary for research (i guess, that was the starting point for my interest in biological research), but also the opportunity to meet new people, beyond proed and tchs.

this time round, though we were the oldest kids on the block, it was pretty much the same experience. but this time, we got to see some pretty amusing people. there were two gals who defaced the logbook. anyone in the research field also knows that that is almost unpardonable? haha but she got away by packing pipette tips into the boxes... thing is, there were about 10 boxes (correct me, if i'm wrong), so kh, a vs guy and i helped them. when the course ended, they gave us an nydc cookie each, as well as skittles. kh and i were, like, omg, they actually bought something... i felt pretty remorseful cos i called one of them a bimbo (who would say something like, "translation? in the math sense?" during a PROTEIN crystallography workshop! lol!)... but i was also touched by that little gesture, by a stranger who appreciated our help.

所谓：礼多人不怪...
this world could be brightened up by a little word of appreciation.

anyway, here's something from c&c3! hot stuff :D

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STJ photos!

2007-04-04T20:59:00.000+08:00

Hmm here are the happy group photos taken courtesy of the passer-by with the neck brace...

Nicely taken, too :D wonder when we'll ever get to do things like this again...

man next week will be extremely exciting for me... competing in 2 taolus on mon and wed... on tues, we'll b going thru bio, KI, and H3 chem papers x.x hope my heart doesn't pop...

too tired to write anything lengthy. will write more next time...

music and lyrics

2007-04-03T21:23:00.000+08:00

haha i shall post stj pics at another time, cos my com's quite crappy for posting pics...

music and lyrics is so nice! haha, "way back into love" is like, 06s7e's anthem? or maybe ongzy would wanna push for "pop! goes my heart" instead :P lol, enjoy!

stj@vivo

2007-03-29T20:20:00.000+08:00

hey all (seniors)! the much anticipated stj is finally here! here are the details:

movie "breaking and entering" at the cathay at around 2 to 3 pm
stj dinner at marche vivo at around 6 or 7pm (joey, you might wanna confirm this?)

budget a little more money cos the new marche might have slightly different prizes.. stay tuned! haha!

2007-03-27T21:12:00.000+08:00

And the hc team gets thrashed by UWC on ch5's arena.

from the 2nd speaker onwards it was quite painful to watch/listen. rawr. flawed strategy; they could have done much better if they worked on that.

and and the opening scenes were *really* corny. the four hs guys in wushu costumes with their uhh weapons, and uwc in a boxing ring. >.<

talking about tv shows, did anyone catch 'police and thief' before that? several funny scenes. kong bak pau and kueh lapis.. haha! =P

oh yeah, david koh on the show is actually matthew's (05s7e senior) brother.

*edit* and yeah, UWC won.

some funny moments in the recap:

hs guy: "how does this eliminate this.. prejudice?"
opponent (loyang?): "...huh?"

proposition: "when i was young, my mummy used to say that looks don't matter. now that i'm grown up.."
opposition: "how credible is your mummy?"

lol!

stj

2007-03-26T21:11:00.000+08:00

hi all! now that we have gotten over the blocks, it's time to focus once again on a great task....STJ! haha... currently, we have a few options, and let's put this to the vote:

1. cai can cook at (somebody's) house

this basically involves chengyi cooking up a storm of lasagne, garlic bread and anything-else-you-would-like-to-order? (just joking :P)! but of course, a chef needs a nice place and good equipment (you know, like a massive industrial oven, cream whipper, nitrogen gas foam-maker, $2000 coffee-maker).. so anyone would like to allow for use/sacrifice his/her residence for destructive creativity (take it easy, cy! ;P )? budget being???

2. dinner at british club

erm, this is actually my idea, so i thought it might be a viable option, should anyone have doubts over cy's culinary skills (don't worry, i don't!)... lol! i can bring you guys in (it's in some ulu part of bt timah, worse than turf city, but it's a pretty nice and quiet place :D) and we can have a no-frills buffet :) for the remainder of this month, there's mexican food and japanese food (i know, it's pretty ironic to have such stuff in a BRITISH club, but wateva)... i'll go and find out what's on offer for the month of april... if you guys want something else, there's fire-baked thin crust pizzas and indian food (tandoori and usual north indian stuff) and traditional british pub grub! budget about 20 to 30 dollars per person :D

3. dinner at my place

yes yes, i heard all the ki people whining already, but is my place that bad??? haha... that's the 2nd option i'm offering - a bbq OR buffet dinner at my place... i know it's out of the way (yeah, bedok's damn ulu, right? RIGHT...) but i can't think of a better place... unless a kind senior would like to offer his/her compounds for havoc, lol!

4. dinner at "triad" (vivocity)

pretty interesting concept... wanna go and see what it's all about! haha, and not to mention the beautiful waterfront at night... wooo... i'm sure somebody in our class would LOVE to enjoy his/her night there... :P

to cast your vote, tag (hope i don't sound cryptic)!

2007-03-26T12:45:00.000+08:00

Hey there =) Blocks should be (almost) over by now for everyone so a short break to slack a bit. Yay for the Monday off for the Bio students =P

Rawr. I feel inspired, but there's so little time, so much out there >.<

Anyway, there was this interesting article in the sunday times. Usually most would skip through that lengthy review section before the sports pages in the papers, but there was this write-up by a former ST correspondent studying jap in a jap university. About the japanese culture of ganbatte and the schooling environment. Nice average-length read haha.

Ok, off to other stuff now =)

Do you realise?

2007-03-24T10:40:00.000+08:00

Hmm the blocks are finally over... (sry phy ppl)... finally get some time to sort my things out... and just appreciate life as it is... for like, what, 2 days? and it's back into the fray with competition and stuff. i hope these few days last just a while longer...

here's a song i find pretty cute and meaningful by the kooky band The Flaming Lips... Besides singing songs abt ninja girls and robots, they actually have songs that make sense and this is one of them:

The Flaming Lips: Do You Realise?

Do You Realise
that you have the most beautiful face
Do You Realise
we're floating in space
Do You Realise
that happiness makes you cry
Do You Realise...
...that everyone you know someday will die

And instead of saying all of your goodbyes - let them know you realize
that life goes fast
It's hard to make the good things last
You realize the sun doesn't go down
It's just an illusion caused by the world spinning round

Do You Realise - that everyone you know
Someday will die -

And instead of saying all of your goodbyes - let them know
You realise that life goes fast
It's hard to make the good things last
You realise the sun doesn't go down
It's just an illusion caused by the world spinning round

Do You Realise - that you have the most beautiful face
Do You Realise

hmm on a quirky sidenote they're actually making a musical on The Flaming Lips...
...it's apparently a story abt ninja girls and robots.

last days.

2007-03-17T08:09:00.000+08:00

hi everyone! it's been almost 3 weeks! we are more "dead-ed" than our jnr class! haha, but even then, it's also cos of our hectic schedule and heavy workloads... as a sidenote, good luck to everyone for blocks! take it as some sort of stepping stone towards the ultimate goal in nov? hmmm...

time flies so fast. it's already a term, and we have seen so many events unfolding - orientation, jts, cny, j1 lecture tests (don't they love the bio ones? >.<), jae... and there's probably more to come.

for me, i think this must be one of the more meaningful march holidays i have ever had. although it's usually just 9 days (inclusive of the weekend before the actual holiday week), most of us probably play it away or catch up on sleep. for me, i had a good time participating in interact camp and ibo training :P

interact camp was a very short event - 2 days with no staying over. most of the stuff we did were games, games and more games. and the people? kids, kids and more kids. at first, i thought i was pretty old, cos i was only one of a handful of j2 non-exco members helping in the camp. while most of the j2s were involved in food and games, i was helping with the kids and interacting (alot) with my group's j1 juniors.

it was a very humbling experience. you had to learn to "summon" your parenting instincts and be a 1. friend, 2. mentor and 3. parent to the kids and j1s, which was quite a mean feat in my opinion. and talking about being a surrogate parent, it was quite funny when this little boy wanted to sit on my lap during one of the games. cos he's so small and frail-looking, i didn't dare to chase him away and there he was, inflicting trauma on poor me... while the j1s looked on! grrh. so interact is not just mindless cip, it's also about having to adapt and adopt...erm...different personae?!

the 2 days passed by in a wink. then came the olympiad training. i guess most, if not all, of you know that 3 out of 5 people in the ibo team are from hc. the other 2 are from rj and ac. it's so weird, i seem to have less to talk to mr wee and mr tan. in fact, i spend my time talking to the rj and ac people and sit with them during lectures.

when people say, "familiarity breeds comfort", is that really true? i can't find anything to say to the other hc guys other than ssef/srp/bio o/basically anything related to science... being familiar hasn't really meant that i have gotten to know them better. is it a gep/s7d thing to keep to themselves? at least the ac and rj people talk about stuff like life, music, movies and philosophy (though neither takes ki)! in fact, we were talking about things like metaphors (my is topic), ethics and social testing... perhaps it's a lot more exciting to share opinions with people you don't have daily exposure to? are hc people prone to closing up on themselves? hmm...

stj still slated for 26th march? please please please get it confirmed soon...

2007-02-24T07:43:00.000+08:00

Hey =) Haha sorry that my blog post has to further push chengyi's one down so I shall follow aaron in saying... Look at chengyi's post! Some really good ideas there to consider.

Anyone wants to plan for STJ? I wouldn't mind =) CK from junior class (their ct rep's initials ;)) said they won't be able to make it next weekend or the following. Then sl + aaron would be off during march holidays due to yltc, and many others more probably have to go for... "intensive practices" during that period =/ after block test maybe?

So many things happened in the past few weeks but no one blogged about it. Heh. I'll try to write a bit on what happened when I get home so we can uhh relive those memories!

JTS was very wild (in the beginning). Was quite surprised at the number of people who got dunked/"volunteered" to get dunked. First CK was dunked, apparently because some people in our junior class have a fetish for seeing his abs? Followed closely by yuan chang and the first senior, yun song. Haha. Quite funny to watch initially 'cos everyone was having fun (except those getting dunked), until something like half the guys there got thrown into the pool. Off the top of my head.. uhh yunsong aaron chengyi (who apparent just jumped into the pool! =P) of the seniors, CK yuanchang junjie esmond (both of whom struggled) wee lic shuliang alycia (the only girl to get dunked, felt quite bad since she was the one hosting us and uhh her parents were there) kaixian and mark. Haha think that's about it.

Anyone got photos of the event? DO post them =) Juniors' blog have some of them on.

The food was pretty good; catered food. Didn't expect to see stuff like duck though. Think we ignored the food and went more for the fun...

After the night started to creep in we started playing party games heh. Truth or dare zhong ji mi ma polar bear murderer and the like. (Some) Forfeits were pretty funny, hugging, mock-kissing that sort. The one I remember was yunsong being sabo-ed to hug liqun. And there were the class' card games like jungle-speed and munchkins.

Oh, and the swing! =/

On the whole it was pretty fun and spontaneous, since the juniors just let everything go with the flow =) Hope you guys had fun too haha.

Long post! heh. maybe more later =) have a good weekend!

The things that matter

2007-02-19T22:37:00.000+08:00

Hey!!! haha so sorry must post after chengyi did!! But... READ CHENGYI'S POST!!! so i'll remind yall thru this post.

Was just thinking about.. yea.. the things that matter. It's not only about us being sad apollo lost fac dance. Caus I guess alot of other things do matter! This really hectic JC2 life's kinda stressful, with teachers breathing down our necks for tutorials, loads of CCA stuff to worry about. Sometimes... we do neglect some of our commitments, even to our friends & yeah... studies. [Read chengyi's post]
So we may neglect the stuff that do matter. I guess after all, life is a balancing act. One way or another, we shld really try finding our equilibrium.

Haha.. i totally enjoyed fac dance!!! Why? Caus I had a great dance partner, was wearing a black jacket, yellow shirt & doing the dance we all practised SO hard for!!!
Its not about whether you can dance.. its more of whether you're willing to dance.Determination does matter! [Read chengyi's post]

Its not about whether we won the fac dance.. caus in the end we won/grabbed the attention of many. Spirit does matter!

Its not about showing off the dance, but showing off our faculty spirit & appreciation to the dance ics!! So... APOLLO does matter!

[Read chengyi's post]

*We really should have taken off our jackets. Caus the transformation of black to yellow would be real cool!

In the end... just think of the things that matter! & after that... don't think anymore! Jezz do it! Yup happy cny still!

& Read Chengyi's Post BELOW!

STJ

2007-02-19T21:53:00.000+08:00

Hello kids. Guess who i am. haha

Since nobody seems to be taking any action regarding STJ, i decided to take a proactive stance, and come up with this suggestion. :))

Step 1: We need someone with a decent sized house ideally more than 2.5k sq ft. That leaves me out.(yay) So Aaron and Zhiyang, you know what to do.. haha

Step 2: We need a big oven, several woks and somewhere with gas.

Step 3: i go buy some stuff

Step 4: I cook(stop giving the skeptical look on your face yunsong, i CAN cook k?)

Suggested menu (restricted to the chef's repertoire). In case you're wondering, the chef is me.
1. Garlic bread
2. Soup
3. Some finger food
4. lasagna
5. Fried rice
6. Special herbal chicken proudly presented by chengyi
7.borrow fondue set from charmaine(I'm sure she will happily oblige) then throw some fruits and marshmallows inside
8. salad(any old person can make this)
9. Some oysters :)

For drinks, we'll jusy buy from Ntuc and someone can donate alcohol(hint hint) then we mix. :)

Any violent objections contact chengyi at 91119786 or alternatively jus tag. Feel free to improvise on the menu.

P.S. This project requires people to contribute their crockery and stuff. Also, the chef cannot possibly manage so many stuff at once. So we need people to help :)

cny celebrations

2007-02-17T09:29:00.000+08:00

hi all! i guess you guys had a great time in college participating in all the fun activities! i was just stoning (perhaps that's why i left school early) and watching apollo and athena dance...

went back to my primary school yesterday. for those who still don't know where i was from, i was from ANGLO-CHEENA SCHOOL (never understood why it's called anglo-chinese anyway... everything's so anglo in acs)!

somehow, when you're at this age, you tend to feel nostalgic. memories flow through our time-weathered minds. it's crazy how much you can actually talk with ex-classmates you haven't seen for months (almost 5 months, since teachers' day?). a whole one-and-a-half hours! you talk about everything under the sun - the inefficiency and idiosyncracies of school management, the poor implementation of the ib in acs i, the lack of vibrancy in the local education system, council activities in both schools, the failure to nurture kids to become better persons, girlfriends, rugby, swimming, why samuel couldn't turn up (council... :/)... endless topics about our little lives in this little red dot.

even after visiting our teacher, the whole bunch of us went to wheelock place for sakae sushi (hey hey guys! i think this is a darn good place for stj! :P). although there were about 12 people whom i have never met before, there's this acs spirit that i could feel, bonding strangers together. i just sat at the table and listened to their conversations, their ramblings, their frustrations. like, doing nothing but listening to people (whose names i know nought). it felt heart-warmingly special to, once again, be part of the community that i left 5 years ago. the friends whom i have known for two-thirds of my life thus far.

eventually, there were only 3 other guys. then we started to yak more about our pri sch lives, recalling our ex-classmates and their whereabouts. we ate, ate and ate (food opens your mouth, remember?)... it struck us how much time we had until the day we enter the army. 10 months and counting. suddenly, i sensed the urgency to have more outings together with my pri sch mates, to keep our childhood memories alive, to maintain the strength in our relationships.

another thought struck me. what about my chi high buddies and college mates? my friend said, "no matter where you are, *points to my heart* you know that, deep down in you, you're an acs boy"... i used to think that pri sch buddies are meant to be forgotten. but now, i have to change my belief. they are there to remind me of the embarrassing things i had done, to remind me of the bullying i had suffered, to remind me of the stars that we folded, to remind me of the dreams that we shared, to remind me of the naivete and innocence of our kiddy actions...

as i left the restaurant, it occurred to me that, perhaps, that day might come soon for me to realise the "hc-half" in me...

this is just a title. ignore it.

2007-02-14T21:33:00.000+08:00

hello everyone. i'm posting again! mainly so that u guys won't see my face each time u visit the class blog... haha. anyway now my blue teddy's featured on two class blogs! yay! u should see the pink one that comes with him ;)

hmm yet another surreal valentine's day for me. like lw said i've got a lot of platonic relationships blah blah blah which is fine for me (i guess. haha.) means i get more goodies lol. to all who have received my ultra cute angels, please take good care of them. they are quite fragile. and i've spent a lot of time on them T_T. so yah they contain my care and concern and what not. (if they *do* break, however, come to me and i'll give you a refund. really.)

just realised this is the last cross country in school i'll ever have. or this was the last i'd ever had. hmm pretty sad, huh? next would be the last CNY in school i'll ever have followed by the last of many other things. shouldn't take them for granted, i guess. haha we must have been a curious sight today. the group of us sitting around singing oldies with cheng yi strumming the guitar. we've got a weird hippie vibe haha. thank u juniors for joining us in the weirdness... a few more ppl really makes the difference sometimes. wish i had brought a camera today... the weather was fine and there were ppl sitting on the slopes and enjoying the wind and scenery. best time i'd ever spent in macritchie.

cny's coming and my cca's performing again! haha this is the last time u'll ever see a wushu performance by my batch so make sure u don't blink... not accustomed to wearing sleeveless nanquan fuzhuang. for some reason all the girls keep on staring at me. sure attention's nice but it gets on my nerves too haha. doesn't help that i'm the *only* dude wearing sleeveless... :S

well on the whole things seem to be looking slightly up for me... maybe cos i'm starting to appreciate company, and i'm finally finding a stable equilibrium in what i do. i'm a libran so equilibrium is very important :P will end my post with this song by Bright Eyes that i particularly like. hope u'd like the lyrics too.

Bright Eyes- Bowl of Oranges

The rain had started tapping
On the window near my bed
There was a loophole in my dreaming
So I got out of it
And to my surprise my eyes were wide
And already open
Just my nightstand and my dresser
Where those nightmares had just been

So I dressed myself and left then
Out into the gray streets
But everything seemed different
Completely new to me
The sky, the trees, houses, buildings
Even my own body
And each person I encountered
I couldn't wait to meet

And I came upon a doctor
Who appeared in quite poor health
I said, "There's nothing I can do for you
You can't do for yourself"
He said, "Oh, yes you can, just hold my hand
I think that that would help"
So I sat with him a while
And I asked him how he felt
He said, "I think I'm cured
No, in fact I'm sure of it
Thank you stranger
For your theraputic smile"

So that's how I learned the lesson
That everyone's alone
And your eyes must do some raining
If you're ever gonna grow
When crying don't help, you can't compose yourself
It's best to compose a poem
An honest verse of longing
Or a simple song of hope

That's why I'm singing, baby, don't worry
Because now I've got your back
And every time you feel like crying
I'm gonna try to make you laugh
And if I can't, if it just hurts too bad
Then we'll wait for it to pass
And I will keep you company
Through those days so long and black

We'll keep working on the problem
We know we'll never solve
Of love's uneven remainders
Our lives are fractions of a whole
But if the world could remain within a frame
Like a painting on a wall
Then I think we'd see the beauty then
And stand staring in awe

At our still lives posed
Like a bowl of oranges
Like a story told
By the fault lines and the soil

ironies abound.

2007-02-06T22:46:00.000+08:00

some pics of ongzy the plushie lover and shuni the (apparent) 7e mascot!

aaron and wk seem to be debating... hmmm.

a lot of things in this world are quite ironic. like, how i might hate someone and still help him or her (wk, you know who i'm talking about). i guess that our class spirit was never quite there after the first 3 months, cos the others didn't seem to be interested. almost vapourised overnight. and what's left was merely a puddle of acid (sorry, all the metaphor thingy i have been reading up on is getting into my head >.<). competition, contempt, hate. it might just happen to our juniors (choi, i hope not), so let's hope that they will always remain the way they are right now... but as ys would say, we can't do anything to change anything, so i shan't worry too much. 杞人忧天 is of no use... maybe that's why the few of us are so 'on' about our junior class. to find what we have lost. to strengthen what is remaining. anyway, enough of all that emo stuff from me. so here are some happy pix! enjoy 7e! i know they are pretty overdue, but better late than never (the perfect excuse for all lessons :D)

our junior class with jin rong! they must have been so traumatised when wk, xiaolei and i crashed the briefing by jr :P

erm... the very "entertaining" prelude to seniors-play with (torture?)-juniors session :) was it 朋友 or 关怀方式? i'm also blur liao... old man is like that lor... only young lads (or, yarng marn >.<) like mr cys can remember fine details :D

sorry guys, gtg sleep... darn tired. all the walking around vivo this afternoon is straining my just-recovered ankle. zzz.

Totally inspiration!!

2007-02-06T21:21:00.000+08:00

[Remember those days? YOUR 7E days...]
Hey! haha i thought abt this so much that I suddenly have a craving for mangosteens!! kk do WE still rmb these?

Well... I won't accept no for an answer!! Haha hate it when posts keep getting moodier & moodier leh! Being emo doesnt hlp one bit.. not one bit. I still remember the time when we painted our glorious banner! We DID put in an effort to blend the red with the yellow.. & then making that gradient rite?? I'd say we could have won best flag lor!!! &&& wheres the flag now?? Lets hang it up again sometime!

OK.. so things DO need an effort for change to occur. If we all want changes, why dun we make them? Although we had disagreements regarding our campfire item & stuff during orientation... things turned out sorta ok didnt it? So we realised that we need class dynamics! & how do we go abt doing that... put in more EFFORT! haha its worth a try! again (haha zhiyang rmb last time?)

Anyway, haha jnrs posting rubbish? Can't be that serious la.. as long as it keeps the blog active! Seriously, I do like the reflections after the apollo cip! It was nice to read. Yep Apollo CIP was a unique experience. & it made me realise stuff thats pretty undescribable. So my mind isn't working now, wld do a nice reflection on this later!

Ok.. like back to the point after abit of meandering.. We 7E-cians are a diverse lot. Really. We're juz so radically different that it may be hard to have fun together, & do class stuff together. But strengths lie in these differences! We know so little about each other, that there juz seems to be so much we can talk about, & so many interests we can exchange with one another!

So dun be sad!!! Though apollo's not the sun god. haha my angel so nicely clarified this!

Things are changing, & things would change! Theres JTS to do so anyway! so convenient haha

*I wonder if our classmates fancy a game of frisbee too!

So after all these disjointed stuff I just typed, juz FORGET THEM ALL!

One thing to remember... REMEMBER 7E

稀客！

2007-02-05T22:09:00.000+08:00

As the entry title suggests (I assume you all can read Chinese, although for Cheng Yi I'm a bit doubtful) I don't often post here (in fact I only posted one as far as i can recall...)

so why the sudden urge to post?

...

no la, just bored lor.

...

just read the EMB entry by Lee Chau Loong, den thought about whether having a competition defeats the purpose of anything (and everything) or not.

like how some juniors are posting rubbish for the sake of posting rubbish. like, for example, listing homework or something (i'm not targeting anyone here, though =D). it's ok to make a blog like an announcement board, but do it only when you have announcements, won't you?

like how performing arts exist solely for SYF Central Judging. Like some bands, who only play competition songs and set pieces.

like how people try to go around the rules and get an advantage, thereby defeating the purpose of the competition.

...

our blog was created ... hmm can't really remember the origins of our blog already. although i vaguely remember a lime green background shit, with elmo and stuff. (you know what i mean)...

ya, in a way our blog is called lingliusqie, but really, since when has it really been a blog for 06s7e? i only ever recall having the locals blogging. ok, the non-prcs, blogging. nt exactly a class, is it.

in a way i find it ironic that, you know, we call our blog lingliusqie, when in reality nothing Chinese really comes here.

or is it just a way for ourselves to lament the class we have?

2007-02-05T21:21:00.000+08:00

Rawr. After all we've done in KI about language and the "power of the written word", I should probably have been more prepared for it. But, no, written stuff still cuts deep.

Pretty hurt to read untruths spread around like that. What it has written is baseless, hypocritical and uninformed. Still, it isn't nice to read.

Maybe whatever doesn't kill you makes you stronger.

-edit- Nah, it isn't anyone from the class.

2007-02-03T07:52:00.000+08:00

Hey there :) Blogging just before I go off to school. Yet another full day heh. This time there's some orientation thing in the afternoon for band so it's out till the evening.

Just realised that (most) of my flute juniors have "links" to our junior class/our class. We've got a large flute section this year - 9! Yifan's brother is in there, Peggy's ex-classmate is in there, Alycia's ex-classmate is there too. And I got an Anderson junior too. Relatively diverse lot -- compared with just batches of HI boys (:

lw your dad must have been pretty freaked out too. Got involved in a weird car incident too. People were cursing and racing and daring each other beside mine. Scary.

Want to go out before JTS? I need to buy clothes for CNY >.<

Shall post again another time. Have a good weekend!

random ramblings.

2007-02-02T22:10:00.000+08:00

omg this is so scary... i was in my dad's car and this woman in another car gestured to get my dad to lower the window. then she started to talk about thomson medical centre. she said something like, the people there THREW her kid AT her and said that they didn't give a darn about her kid... i can't believe my dad actually lowered the window to talk to her. if i were him, i would be so freaked out by this weird woman who's trying to get my attention/get someone to listen to her, in the middle of the main road!

omg there's this DMZ peace trek for scouts this coming august! apparently, this is the 13th year the south korea scout association is organizing it... but this year, they are promoting it on a larger scale cos it's the centenary of scouting, lol... i wanna go for the trek, but its in the midst of the a level exam prep T_T i mean, how often do you get the chance to walk in the 38th parallel? stupid exams.

ah, chromosome x chasing chromosome y! lolz... still think that chromosome discussion during ki is darn interesting... yifan's so darn knowledgeable! how come he knows so much...

excerpt from mizwang's blog :P :

Surrealism goes like this

Mizwang to 7E: Hi, I'm on MC today and won't be in school.

Ongzy of 7E replies something to the effect of: Oh so what shall we do with ourselves?

Mizwang to 7E: Hang from the rafters. Or paint the school green. Whateva!

Ongzy: Is painting school green some complex metaphor for photosynthesis?

What has the world come to? Am I dinosaurish, but since when would you ask your teacher what to do during a free period?? Goodness, go to Coro and buy a pao pao cha or sthg la!! Or go KAP and hang out la!! Play bridge (but don't get caught) for all I care!!

Siao kids.. when I was a student "Teacher is sick" was almost as good as a half day off school. Sheesh!

oh well, rant rant. thanks everyone for your care and concern! my ankle is better now :) i shall resolve not to quote qt again, lest karma decides to knock on my door (or ankle) again >.< back to the mundane life of tuts and ki essays... bleh.

2007-02-02T03:46:00.000+08:00

Harry Potter And The Deathly Hallows will be released on the 21st of July... which happens to be Racial Harmony Day here. J.K. Rowling has gone on record to say that she'll be evil. Rawr. So this probably marks the (upcoming) end of whatever dreams the fanfic writers had of seeing their ideas published in the official version.

Ok, so the above three sentences didn't make any sense. Shall post a more coherent post after school today (:

a day at interact.

2007-01-31T21:27:00.000+08:00

hi everyone! now that we have juniors visiting our blog, we should write something nice to make it worth their visit, lol! then again, anything is better than listing homework-to-be-done and tutorials-to-be-finished-before-lectures >.<

hmm. today i was at mcyc doing peer tutoring. i was teaching this malay student from yusof ishak a math. we only managed to do, like, two questions in an hour, but we covered plenty of ground, from completing squares to rationalizing... after the session, he was telling me the reason why he chose to go for the tuition at mcyc. he said that external agencies provide a math tuition at $80/hr while a math tuition at mcyc is completely free. although we (the volunteers) have no qualifications to speak of (no degrees, no diplomas, and no o level cert for some of us!), they trust us to deliver. and they are really enthusiastic about learning, saying "thank you" after every sentence you utter, asking questions after you have explained everything!

from these encounters, i really felt that i was making some positive difference in them, that they were really happy to have someone to teach and guide them. although there's no pay for us, we don't feel "overqualified but underpaid". rather, it warms your heart to know that someone out there has been touched by you, and that satisfaction (that roots from some form of altruism, i suppose) is really the THING that keeps interactors going... ok, i'm not trying to give some propaganda speech on behalf of interact exco! but seriously, this form of contribution to society is way more meaningful than some one-off cip or bonding with friends during cca...

i guess, for everyone, there is a point when we actually realise how much more we can do. for me, i started out doing interact stuff because i wanted to accumulate cip hours. but now, it's really about helping people who need you and appreciate your work... cip and achievements are just bonuses along the way...hmmm... does that sound like something that i said last year? anyway, my point is: don't take things for granted! these students may not be able to afford the best tutors in town, but they have the best learning attitude! on the other hand, some of us keep on whining about how this-and-that is not going well, despite having all the resources at the back of our hands.. perhaps, less is more?

heh heh. i use much much much fewer emoticons this year! haha, now caitou has nothing to say about me le :P

well, for now, juniors, please enjoy yourselves for the remaining few weeks... the roller coaster ride is about to begin.

random: i heard two people talking about philosophy on the mrt! so cool! haha... kids, take some time to think and reflect. it's good for your mental well-being :D

2007-01-22T21:08:00.000+08:00

Rawr. Back again.. sorry I haven't posted for so long. My (cranky) computer has cut me off from lots of things after school. Shall do my part to revive the blog =)

Apparently our juniors have an online presence already =) Check them out at 07S7E!

We shall always ensure that any piece of paper with incriminating stuff like "XXX for all for only $2" shall be secured tightly to our class bench to prevent future/further embarassing incidents =P

juniors and us :)

2007-01-11T21:22:00.000+08:00

not gonna let the blog just go to waste now... so here are the pics that i took on the day of our interact-with-juniors session :P

fun with jaw surgery

2006-11-27T21:51:00.000+08:00

Hello guys! This is the first time I'm actually posting anything here. Chengyi here btw.

First of all, I want to thank Yunsong and Liangwei for visiting me twice, once at the hospital, once at home. I really appreciate it. :) treat you all lunch next time. Go eat Indian buffet. Haha

Next, i want to thank Aaron and Yunsong(again) cos they helped me when i got drunk that day and puked in yunsong's car.(sorry for the car yunsong). Really sorry for all the trouble. Treat Aaron to Indian buffet also.

today is the 6th day after my operation, nad my face is still swollen like some pumpkin. It was like this 1 day post-op: Notice the two nice containers dangling there to pump excess blood out of my mouth so i dont choke

Now its like this:

The whole operation process itself is really a traumatising ordeal. Let me convince you why.

Day 1 : slacking day

Went to Changi hospital after lunch(my 2nd last meal. Its was chicken rice, which i can't eat now). Checked in into my ward, and to my disappointment, i was not allowed to slack around east point as i had expected i could. Within 5 minutes of checking in, i was tagged with the hospital tag and ordered to change into those super unglam hospital pyjamas. Being the very obedient boy i am, i do not question authority, and i donned the ugly pyjamas. Then i rotted for like 1 hour, just observing people around me. The person on the bed to my left going for operation on his back cause he too fat. The person directly opposite removing kidney stone. Oh ya, my ward on the forst day was the operating ward. So everybody got op the next day. After awhile i think the nurses decided the were too free, so they stuck this huge needle thing into the back of my hand to use for intravenous stuff after the op. Was quite gross. Then yunsong and liangwei came to visit me while my aunt and uncle and cousin were watching "so you think you can dance" with me.(i love that show man). I was supposed to fast after 12 am, so i basically stuffed myself with junk food. Actually hospital food tastes not bad leh. the first dinner was pineapply pork rice. But well, yunsong insists i am a very not discerning eater, so maybe its just me. That night was the last chance for me to sleep properly in days, but thanks to some fat guy(to my left), who snored at like 110 decibels, none of us in the other beds could sleep, so ended up reading "My sister's keeper" by jodi picoult the whole night. That book not bad.

Day 2: Operation day ( ARGH)

At around 7 am, that fat guy woke up. So i slept for like 45 min. I was told to brush me teeth really really well. So i spent like 10 minute brushing me teeth in the morning. Feld very hungry and thirsty, but cannot eat. I tried eating a sweet also get caught by nurse. Damn suey.
Then they pushed this v v high bed into the room and ask me to climb on in. Then they interrogated me on my diet, bowels and blah blah.
then the bring me to the operating theatre, and another identical interrogation process begins. After the standard shenanigans from the nurses, i finally met the surgeons and the anethesiologist( had to check dictionary to spell this damn word). They asked me the same damn questions again. Now they had to check the tube hey poked in my hand the day before. Turns out that the needle i blocked cos its lodged in my vein or sth liddat. So they had to repoke the whole thing. Only found out after i woke up, and i was like wtf? I spent like 10 hours with this tube sticking out of my left hand and now its useless? urgh. Anyway the anesthesia knocked me out, and i woke up at 8 pm with a swollen face. Oh ya, my nice surgeons poked another tube through my right hand, and in order to do it, they must tie this nice thing ard it while i as asleep. And they forget to remove it, It was there for llike 11 hours. So until now my right and got this slightly swollen band. The first night was pure hell. Due to the fact that my operation was around the jaw area, i would be unable to breathe during the op itself. So during the op, they stuck this tube down my windpipe to pump oxygen. As a result, my windpipe became irritated, and produced copious amounts of phlegm. I was lying down on the bed in ICU, and felt out of breath cause my nose was goddamn clotted with phlegm. Apparently this problem is anticipated, so they have this nice contraption, which is basically a tube with a vacuum pump, to suck the phlegm out. Ok, if i was able to open my mouth, this wouldn't be much of the problem. Unfortunately, my jaws are tied together so they dont drop off. I have to suck the phlegm out through the gaps in my teeth. this isnt exactly very easy and pleasant. This is but one reason for my discomfort.

Next, as i will be bedridden for awhile, they had to make sure i dont pee in my pants. So they shoved a urinary catheter up my pee-hole.(ouch.) It was not just painful, it was undignifying but wth. If i stay still, the catheter hurts a little. If i move, it hurts alot. Think you guys get the idea. The removal of this catheter thing is very simple. The nurse simply pulls down your pants, and yank the tube of of your freaking pee-hole. It fucking hurts. I was traumatised for life. Hurt like 10 times more than the time i broke my arm. For days after this ordeal, it hurts when i pee. Not to mention the loss of libido(of course this is temporary) My appendage is fully functional now, thank you.

Moreover, as i was in ICU, they had to take my blood pressure once every 15 minutes. They quite technologically advanced leh, the machine automatically take one. For those of you whole have taken bp before, I am sure the constriction around your arm is not very pleasant. Once every 15 minutes means i wasn't able to fullt straighten me arms until 3 days later.

My mouth, which has been shut and bloody for hours, stank like a sewer. I blow air out of my nose, and find out that it stinks. Its that bad. Not to mention not drinking water for more than 24 hours. The vile smell contributed to my insomnia i guess.

To make matters worse, i have lost all feeling in my lower lip and chin due to nerve damage. Surgeon says this might take years to heal completely. Does that mean that kissing will not turn me on now, as the nerve endings there are not connected to my brain? Don't dare to ask the surgeon. Haha. I'm a shy boy.

Day 3:

I was discharged from the ICU today. Went for lessons on how to feed through a syringe and proper oral hygiene now that me teeth are tied together. Got my first taste of the complete nutrition in one milk shake thing. Taste not bad sia. breakfast? Milo. Lunch? soup Dinner? soup. If you know my eating habits, you will know i am a sad boy now. I am now in a B2 ward, cause me operation costs 9k less than if you stay in a B1. The gahmen figures that if you can afford B1, which in actual fact doesnt cost that much more than a B2, you can jolly well afford the operation without subsidies. So for the first time in v long, i had to sleep without aircon. Well, actually its quite coll at night. Buti couldn't sleep at all cos my nostrils are clogged, and i am told that under no conditions am i supposed to blow my nose, as it might cause my operation scars to tear open. AT around 10 pm, a perfectly healthy looking guy checked in, and jus refuse to off his head light. It was glaring into my eyes, so i drew the curtains ard my bed. The nurse found ou then she was not happy. Don't let me. So in the end i just typed on my phone "please shut that light, its affecting me." should have seen the look on the mother's face. It was dark and i looked like a scary monster with my freaking swollen face. She backed away when i approached. Actually, an upside to the swelling is that since i looked so F-ed up, i can look at random people and scare the shit out of them. They will look at me from the side, and think i don't notice, then i will turn and look at them right in the eye. Almost all of them flinch. YEAH MAN. Din't succeed in making little kids cry though. Some even laughed at my big face. Evil little beings. Those jokers probably thing a have a bloody tumour or something like that. Anyway, i couldn't breathe that night. I was turning hysterical and bugging the nurses, Then they decided to give me nasal drops(Something you never want to try) and i asked for a painkiller injection.( which gave me a non-stop 2 hour slumber) I was freaking happy. Finally some sleep.

DAy 4:
Discharged!

Was supposed to be discharged at 12, but as Changi is super inefficient, they pharmacist was very late, and i reached home at 3 liddat. Fell asleep for awhile, then yunsong and liangwei visited. Haha. They keep writing notes to each other then i cannot see. I showed them the drivethru song(americans are bloddy free). Love you guys man. Thx for the protein yunsong, haha. Tastes quite nice.

WAh. The entry damn long. K la continue another day. Thanks for the support again :)

-ChengYI ( - . - ) bigface

playing around with msn

2006-11-26T10:38:00.000+08:00

hmm things sort of died down here after liangwei's bbq... so i shall ramble a bit...

was looking at my msn messenger one day and i realised that i had like over a hundred msn contacts! (i'm sure many of you have even more...) But the weird thing is that over the past year i've only chatted with a set group of ten ppl consistently... Classmates, wushu ppl, most of the time. which is pretty weird since half of my contacts occupy the same jc... and i see some of them almost everyday...

i guess jc life makes me pretty myopic and narrow. there are usually so many pressing matters that i don't have time to look around and even say hi to some of my old friends. and just like that, my old friends start to fade away, right in front of me.

maybe i should start deleting some of my contacts. haha sad to say i've kept some from my primary school days for sentimentality. many of them have changed e-mails or have moved on long ago. i hope that doesn't happen to any of my other contacts...

so anyways i was very annoyed at that. so i've made a pact with myself to chat with random friends on msn whenever i have the time. so far, i'm happy to say that they didn't dao me :P
and it is fun to find out how much they've changed/stayed the same. and most importantly it is comforting to know that relationships can be maintained as long as a little bit of effort is put into it...

BBQ last sun

2006-11-16T21:54:00.000+08:00

oops i've been quite occupied for the past few days... er-hem liang wei's bbq was great! there was food, people, and sparkly thingies. what more can we ask for :P

haha liang wei i hope we didn't traumatise the residents of your area...

will let the photos explain the rest.

how to get to lw's hse

2006-11-11T16:07:00.000+08:00

hey guys! some ways to my place:

1. by car - if you happen to have a chaffeur/parent who can drive, the address is 213 bedok south avenue 1. just tell the guard that you are here for the bbq :)

2. by bus
- bus services that go to casafina/hitachi consumer pdts: 12,31,196,197,608

from these two bus stops, just walk to the side gate of this orange-and-white coloured condominium and give me a call at 81282316. i will go let you in :)

- bus services that go to landville condo/evergreen gardens: 10,12,13,14,48

if you're at evergreen gardens, walk in the direction of the mobil station (not sure if it's still mobil, but anyway, the petrol station will be to your left as you alight from the bus). as you walk, you will see an orange-and-white coloured condominium (that part should be predominantly white, cos there was a paint job in recent months) on your RIGHT. at this point, you should be moving against the traffic... continue walking along the perimeter of the condominium until you reach the guardhouse. either call me at 81282316 or ask the guard to direct you to the bbq pits.

if you're at landville condo, cross the road and do as stated above :P

3. by mrt (i assume you would be at bedok mrt ya)

either
- walk towards bus stop 2 (the bus stop opposite the bus interchange and on the same side as ping yi secondary sch)
- take 31 and alight at casafina (bus stop at mrt -> 1st bus stop -> 2nd bus stop -> casafina bus stop)

or
- look at the map in the station and start walking along bedok south avenue 1, until you see the orange-and-white coloured condominium (this should take about 15 min :P)

if you happen to be in sch by any chance, the following options are available:
1. take 67 to bedok mrt and go to the opp bus stop via the underpass and take 31 to casafina.
2. take 67 to the bus stop after lorong 1 geylang, take 31 to hitachi consumer pdts bus stop and cross the bridge to reach my place.
3. take a bus to any bus stop along dunearn road, take 48 to evergreen gardens and alight (refer to "by bus", on the part about getting to my place from evergreen gardens)

phew.

bbq this sun! :)

2006-11-06T20:46:00.000+08:00

hey everyone! the long-awaited bbq is finally here! here are some information:

place: liang wei's place (address: 213 bedok south avenue 1, casafina...)

date/time: 12th nov, 6.30 pm

what you can eat (tentative :P):
stingray
squid
chicken
pork
hot dogs
satay (beef and mutton)
otah
baguette (with olive oil)
chocolate fondue (with marshmallows and the correct type of fruits) - ccy the rotting kid shall get stuff for this :)
additional dessert done by joey

*anyone wants mussels? i tried bbqing them and they taste, oh so good ;)

people we intend to invite:
everyone in ki class!
wee kiat
q^2
ni chen
05s7e
mizwang
mr lim

any violent objections? please tell me by wed if you're coming and if you have any special dietary requirements (e.g. don't eat beef, like mr choo :P)...

back from camp...

2006-10-29T12:39:00.000+08:00

hey everyone! apparently i haven't been killed by something in the forest YET, so i shall write something about the days i spent in the forests in punggol/bt timah/sembawang. nothing to do with the technical stuff of survival skills, but the stuff all of us were talking about - scouts, studies and life in general ;) maybe i will drop a few random stuff we encountered during those few days :P

*random* we managed to get a lot of food from the sea! water (precious commodity) in bottles that floated from nowhere, orange, brinjal/eggplant, shrimp (not prawns, it's those xia mi thinggy) ... we had very little water so we just drank the water from the bottles that floated by (damn sick,right? but no choice :/). edmund tasted the orange and gave up on it, while 12 of us shared one *rotten* brinjal after roasting. but the most fun thing we actually saw were shrimp that were washed up the shore into a water collection contraption that one group made. when the tide came in, the shrimp were trapped in the hole and they started to jump around (they can walk too, but there was a plastic sheet beneath them :P) but to no avail. in the end, they were cooked by the sun (sounds sadistic, but ya, i bet they taste nice, free of the sand they died in)!

last night, i was talking to this other rj guy about scouts and studies. it seemed as though most of us have the same attitude towards these two subjects: that scouts at jc level should take the backseat and that we should concentrate on our studies. when we were in secondary school, we could use a lot of time just to pursue cca stuff and still manage our studies very well. but now, with so many changes to the environment (academic and scouting), priorities seem to change, and somehow, i just can't be bothered with this thing called scouts. it's taking its toll on me. to make things worse, we are the pioneer batch doing the revised syllabi and ip. so much uncertainty surrounds our future.

last night, a leader asked me to make my self-introduction. and i said something, which i haven't had time to consider carefully till then. that was, "this is my 7th year of scouting". 7 years. i only started to question my meaning and existence as a scout after so many years. the first 6 years was fun, just enjoying myself in abandon. this year totally sucked. i have no idea what i have been doing this year. totally lost. perhaps i am in a dilemma. some residual interest in scouts and greater concern for studies. which one to choose? after so many months and multiple entries, i still haven't resolved this stupid issue. why is it so hard?

perhaps a great (i don't know if i qualify as 'great', but i hope i can be one which my juniors can find pride in and look up to) leader needs no titles or awards. those titles probably just tell people how good your technical skills are, and let people say, "hey, we have a president's scout here!" in situations requiring those specialist skills. but leaders are much more than that. they have that ability to move, motivate and mingle with their subordinates/juniors. if i could choose, i would rather be a leader of the second type. 'cos a leader is a team player, a person delegating jobs and overseeing stuff, and he is the one who is able to make use of different talents and resources to come up with a solution to the problem. to me, that is invaluable and way harder to acquire, compared to skills. reminds me of the doc in "lost" and the commando officer who came to hc to talk to us the other time... people who do not have the know-hows of survival (at least, in the start) but manage to tide through by careful planning and stuff..

hmm. just some food for thought :)

s'pore biennale!

2006-10-16T21:48:00.000+08:00

Woohoo what a trip! Starting from city hall we made our way through the endless art exhibits all the way to tanglin camp. Along the way we've seen things weird, disturbing, beautiful and wonderful... mostly disturbing. but heck. let the pictures do the talking:

photos

2006-10-15T20:31:00.000+08:00

hey pple,

i need some photos for a photo slideshow on the 23rd Oct. pls upload them either on the blog or the yahoogroup or send them directly to me at aardwolf90@yahoo.com yeah liangwei contributed some from the previous post, but its better to have more. so if you have more photos of pple in the class (random photos taken in sku, some other weird sku event, while hanging out, etc) , pls send them to me by tuesday 17/10. thanks a lot. since it'll be made public during the fac outing, i'll exercise some selection as to which photos are "appropriate". hahahahahahaha

i promise i wont embarass anyone.

yunsong

s'pore biennale outing

2006-10-14T11:24:00.000+08:00

hmm the outing's tmrw... and i STILL dunno who's going from our class...

anyway here's the plan so far: we're probably going to meet at city hall mrt at like 9.45... buy tickets from the city hall station and try to visit as many arts exhibits as possible... it's going to be fun!

so anyhow anyone who's interested sms me by today so that i hav a rough idea of who to account for. and dun be late!!!

fribsee finals

2006-10-05T22:26:00.000+08:00

before going on to talk abt today's games, i just wanna say "a job well done" to all the guys and gals who made our 3rd position a reality! joey (though she couldn't play today), q2 (whom i couldn't contact the whole afternoon), yifan (for supporting us today and playing yesterday), ongzy (for playing yesterday and being on the receiving end of a fast-moving fribsee :/), cy (for the long-range fribsee launches), ys (the seeker), and last but not least, aaron the captain! of course we have gotta thank alicia and rebecca from 71 (for being our unfortunate substitutes today :P) !

for the first game, we were up against a11. it was a tough fight, but we managed to win 5-2!

then, we had to play against 72. we had 7 people. they had around 16 people. but we began to create a greater margin with every passing minute, despite all the tough and rough defence put up by them... then mr r stopped us a few minutes before the end of the game to "settle" our substitution disputes. it was pretty weird to do such a thing at such a time, but i suppose desperate situations call for desperate measures? it was a moment of disappointment. but it's not a minute of defeat. we conceded this round and the 2 remaining matches were 72 vs 60 (60 emerges victorious 12-1! ki people rox :D) and 75 vs 7e (friendly match with plenty of "apollo whoosh" between both teams, lol). we took home 3rd place, while our fellow apolloians took 4th place. in the end, apollo emerged (should emerge... dunno whether pe department will screw things up more) with more points than any other faculty in the competition! yay!

hear our class being announced over the pa! woot! for something non-science/math-related for the first time!

great work, guys and gals! we can all celebrate some weekend - with more frisbee >.<>.<

Obligatory after-exams post

2006-10-04T20:56:00.000+08:00

HI EVERYONE OUR PROMOS ARE OVER?!?!11?!//!?!?!!!

...phew had to let that out. but it's true! and the change in college atmosphere's astounding! no more glum faces to greet u every morning! no more exams in the hall x.x and even the weather's been good today... especially for frisbee!

...shall leave the frisbee match news to the others to post. all i can report on was that i got subbed by half-time... :D anyhow, i think u guys rock! the gals too. i think they're natural pros o.o oh yah happy b'day joanne!

barely coherent at the moment... but, as this is the obligatory after-exams post, i'm allowed some leeway :P yes there's wushu training again!!! ultra tiring, but we're trying our best! u guys better watch the performance ah!

okay thatz all! wait one more thing... make the best of these few days! have as much fun as possible! yup... now i'm done... bbye!

2006-09-15T20:03:00.000+08:00

from your resident calvin&hobbes reader, yunsong. haha there's more to come.

some things that (hopefully) cheer you all up :)

2006-09-11T22:07:00.000+08:00

pix i took during teachers' day :P and a nice comic strip that might spark something ki-ish in you... lol. happy mugs everyone!

philosophy the light-hearted way

2006-09-07T10:34:00.000+08:00

haha, came across this joke when reading wiki... enjoy =)

Descartes walks into a bar and orders a drink.

He quickly downs the refreshing beverage.

The bartender notices his empty glass and asks "Another?"

Descartes replies, "I think not."

And poof — he disappears!

random. random. random.

courtesy of alvin mak (06s7b) :P

2006-08-29T22:03:00.000+08:00

Reach

When block test, leaves you feeling blue
You can count on me, I will be there for you
When it seems, all your H3 dreams
Are a million miles away, I will re-assure you

We've got to all stick together
Classmates, there for each other
Never ever forget that
I must mug and you must mug, so

Reach for your As
Score every exam higher
Reach for your As
Mug to your heart’s desire
Reach for your As
And when you get straight As for A levels
That's when your dreams will all come true

There's a place waiting just for you
It’s a special place you can mug till you’re blue
Find that place, it should be quiet too
Stop that DoTA game, leave your Us behind you

Don't stop, gotta keep mugging
Your hopes, gotta keep building
Never ever forget that
I've got notes and you've got notes, so

Reach for your As
Score every exam higher
Reach for your As
Mug to your heart’s desire
Reach for your As
And when you get straight As for A levels
That's when your dreams will all come true

Must believe what Mrs Lee has told
If you start mugging you can reach your goal
No-one knows just what the future holds
There ain't nothing you can't be
If you mug till you vomit

I said mug!
Score for every exam (mug!)
Reach for your As (mug!)
Time to start mugging
And your dreams will all come true

Reach for your As
Score every exam higher
Reach for your As
Mug to your heart’s desire
Reach for your As
And when you get straight As for A levels
That's when your dreams will all come true

Reach for your As
Score every exam higher
Reach for your As
Mug to your heart’s desire
Reach for your As
And when you get straight As for A levels
That's when your dreams will all come true
Reach for your As
Score every exam higher [fade to finish]

*note: can substitute "A levels" with "your promos"

reflections. revelations. rambling?

2006-08-24T22:07:00.000+08:00

don't think i wanna say anything to do with time liao. i guess we all know the urgency of matters right now, and for those (like me) who aren't satisfied with things as they are right now, well, all i can say, is "do something about it"...

i suppose my tag tells quite a bit about how i feel these days. i'm not sure if i told anyone of you, but i actually have a hike this coming september. yup. 2 weeks before the promos. my fellow scouts said that i was insane. perhaps. but at that time, i was confident i could manage it all. after all, driven by passion and stuff, it seemed that nothing could stop me from going on this hike.

passion.

somehow, i sense that my passion for certain things has diminished. scouts is probably the area i am becoming less passionate about. not that i don't love scouts anymore, just that i don't have the same level of passion and interest in it. when things start to disappoint you and turn out very different from what you expect (despite concessions and repeated desperate attempts to accomplish impossible tasks), thanks to politics and stuff, you can't help but wonder if those goals are really achievable and whether the end product (if achieved/obtained) means anything at all.

yet now, i hear a higher calling (possibly from God). should i follow that inner (or divine) voice to do something new, exciting and life-changing (for others and myself)? or should i continue to strive towards my current objective, which i find increasingly hard to commit to?

sigh.

5 weeks left

2006-08-19T21:09:00.000+08:00

i'm blogging now cos i'm too disgusted to do my written report at the moment.

i've spent more time editing (read: re-doing) my teammates' portions than doing real work to the WR. dun worry lw i'm not toking abt yours cos i haven't reached it yet. if itz any indication, our full introduction all the way until data collection is only 1/3 the length of our solutions. and the content is even more imbalanced. gah. and i've got a feeling that everyone expects me to magically finish everything by monday! wow! i think itz partially my fault for giving them the impression that i can do everything, but some aid for a fellow teammate couldn't hurt, right? especially when that teammate's trying to save your butt.

i've been doing a lot of butt-saving lately. helping ppl out when i didn't have to. doing more than i should, cos i'm more "understanding". and cos i dun wanna see ppl that i care abt mess up if i can help it. but i get annoyed when ppl assume that itz my duty to save their butts. i guess they forget that i have problems with time as well. amazingly, i've put off promo mugging for three long weeks. so much for a study plan.

wushu training's been officially stopped. guess that finally gives me a chance to catch up. with srp and olympiad and hw and pw and promos. one big hurdle at a time.

2006-08-13T12:35:00.000+08:00

hmm. ytd's leap was quite ok leh. in fact, it was quite fun! you all should have gone... :/

well, i hope everyone is getting into mug mode... maybe you all are already starting to prep, that's why the blog is so quiet nowadays... :P

hmm. i have been thinking quite a lot about the true nature of success for the past few days, after reading tharman's statements in an interview. i suppose most of us already understand this fact, but really, must we simply accept things as they are right now? he said that the reason why singapore's top brains can never match up to america's geniuses is that "they are a talent meritocracy and we are an exam meritocracy". perhaps my recent performance had a part to play in making me think about success and how to achieve it :/ really, are we just gonna go and mug real hard for a levels, get a scholarship and a diamond rice bowl and live in the lap of luxury for the rest of our lives? seriously, i can't stand it.

the most successful people (in terms of wealth) probably didn't even make it through university. bill gates is a classic example (perhaps "dropout from harvard" was a pretty good selling point, considering the fact that he even managed to get into harvard... ok, just joking :P). i think attitude is a more significant factor. so what if we don't get a for all our subjects? people in singapore think that a degree saves us time and trouble by letting us enter the corporate hierachy at a higher rung. but does this early entry mean quick promotions and eventual success?

i'm not trying to say that we shouldn't study hard and try to get some sort of sponsorship to bring us through tertiary education. but then, it is also necessary to reflect on the type of person we wanna turn out to be. so many people receive scholarships but how many actually gain success and satisfaction? so many people receive awards of all sorts but how many actually have that elusive "right attitude"?

last thought i have in mind: cherish everyone around you, no matter how strong your bond is with the person... you never know what might happen next. thanks to the people who made me "re-realise" the meaning of this...

studying brings into mind ocktober fest: mug for promos and choke yourself with booze after that :P oh well, these are your regular random ramblings from yours truly... ciao...

welcome to the future

2006-08-08T22:10:00.000+08:00

haha saw this really cool thing, thought might wanna share. some dutch designer managed to make a floating bed.

yeah, isn't that cool? no strings attached. he installed magnets in both the ground and bed itself, and the natural repulsion between like poles makes the whole bed float. the bed's only kept in place by thin steel wires (i think).

the best thing is that the "bed" is actually only a floating platform, i.e. there's no mattress. so it can also double up as a dining table, writing desk, or anything u want it to be actually. talk about revolutionary interior design.

the bad part about this cool bed is that it goes at an exorbitant price of 1.2 million euros, which is a tad pricey for a bedframe, no matress, no covers. haha and those with piercings, like earrings etc, dun go in the space between the ground and the bed, for quite obvious reasons. imagine your tongue getting stuck to the bottom of the bed haha.

disappointment.

2006-08-04T21:28:00.000+08:00

i suppose what ongzy wrote bears some truth... i don't think most of us are quite happy with the fact that there are people in our class who can't be bothered with showing basic courtesy and are more concerned with some math, chemistry or physics problem.. perhaps that is the result of cultivating so-called talents. talents who have high iq but low eq. so what if we produce some genius? if that person cannot even treat fellow human beings as people worthy of basic respect and goes on stepping on others' feet (no pun intended with regard to qq's incident), that person is a destined failure.

as for the general lack of chivalry in the college, i can't help but agree... i mean, the only truly chivalrous person i have seen around is victor? girls in the college just think that guys from the other side of the institution are complete jerks who sit on the benches and do not give a hoot about the girls standing around them, and slam the doors in their faces. and some tchs people actually live up to these "negative reputations" and do the very things that are a bane to a gentleman's existence. in the end, we have the tchs stereotype - selfish, ungentlemanly, barbaric, arrogant...

even after 7 months, some people still do not change their attitudes towards the opposite sex. and for guys like xzl who stay in the boarding school and are exposed to girls more often than the local guys, it's quite puzzling why they cannot treat girls the same way we do. that is, giving them the basic respect and performing the duties of a gentleman...

ongzy's blog title evokes a lot of thoughts in my mind. haha, but then i managed to see the tv ad for the album, so ya...

anw jiayou for promos! aaron thinks i'm giving him peer pressure to study :P lol. that's random... but ya, see you all next week and remember to reflect on the happenings in the past week...